Bebunu

Please Sign the Petition

2008-07-03T19:18:00.001-04:00

We want to keep birth normal and if you want that too please go there and sign this petition.

Awful....just Awful

2008-05-25T12:31:00.002-04:00

I have to post a link to this website. Oddly enough, I just attended my first birth as a doula (more to come on that), and the couple had to switch doctor and hospital the day before their due date, for a similar reason than on that story..it's just sad and maddening that full term mommies and even laboring mommies have to fight for their rights and to be listened to.

Each Thing on its Own Time

2008-05-23T15:43:00.013-04:00

I feel really bad, because I won a contest a long time ago and I never publicly thanked the person who did the contest and gave me all kind of goodies. Nicole, over at Bellies and Babies asked expectant parents, new or aspiring doulas to write a post and link it to her blog "in an effort to raise awareness about birth rights and to promote active birthing" since her blog talks about just that. Well I won and this what I received:

This is my very own Birth Ball!!!

You can see the birth ball, some Luna bars, a pregnancy wheel, a doula pocketbook, 2 tennis balls, hot hand packs, a mini rebozo, a cool bag to carry all of this in and more...(I love my dog's nose and my niece's foot on the picture!)

A close-up of the Doula pocketbook

Thank you so much again Nicole!

I must admit that I felt a little like a cheater, because even though it's been my dream for years to become a doula I hadn't signed up for anything and didn't know if I could ever do my job and be a doula at the same time....fast forward to the end of March. One Friday night I was alone at home and really thinking about becoming a Childbirth Educator (CBE). I went online to do some research (for the thousandth time) and found Passion for Birth. It really caught my attention and I loved the fact that with their training I would become a Lamaze CBE.

To help me make a decision, I decided to contact Barbara Hotelling, who is the CBE who will be doing the training in my area in September. I didn't know what to expect, but I found a real jewel. She is a relly awesome and inspiring woman with a HUGE heart. After my first e-mail she offered to meet with me (if I had known at that time that she was at one time Lamaze International's President and at another DONA's President I might not have sent her an e-mail!) I have been to a few of her classes already and needless to say that I have signed up to follow the Passion for Birth's training.

I am really excited about it all. I really believe that things happen for a reason, and only when a person is ready for it. I have been waiting for this for many years and I am trying to just take it all in and enjoy it.

Dilemna

2007-12-22T14:52:00.001-05:00

I am torn. I am successful at what I do for a living (I am an accoutant) and I am pulled towards birth by a force I can't ignore. I recently started a new job, a great job at a great company and I am thinking about doing my MBA to further improve my knowledge and my career in my field. On the other I feel like I need to be involved somehow with pregnant women and birth.

One of my co-worker's wife is pregnant and I find myself wanting to lend her my books, show her my videos, take her to the meetings where they talk about mother friendly maternity care and don't even know her and barely know her husband. I am re-reading "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth", watching videos on Youtube and reading blogs like Bellies and Babies,
Navelgazing Midwife, Belly Tales, Mama Mid(Wife) Madness , Midwife: Sage Femme, Hebamme, Comadrona, Partera, and others to learn more and immerse myself into it.

I don't know what to do. I can't really doula considering my position, because even though they are pretty flexible, there are times during the month when I can't be away from my job. I would like to become a Lactation Consultant, but it seems like I would have to go to school for a few years to be able to do that. I think that my best option would be to become a Childbirth Educator. I have been thinking about it, all I need is to make a decision, I know that once I make the decision I'll jump into it and do it, but it's not an easy decision to make.

I think that it's important for me to keep doing my job so that once I have a family we can live comfortably, I just want to be involved in the world of pregnancy and birth somehow. I want to spread the word that birth can be amazing and empowering and that it is important for a child to be born in a gentle and loving environment and not be handled roughly and taken away immediately after birth. I want to tell pregnant women that they don't NEED an epidural, what they need is to be able to move freely, be surrounded by professionals who care about them and will stay with them to reassure them that they are doing a great job and that they CAN do it, that they are doing it.

The Finger Joke

2007-12-09T09:59:00.000-05:00

Last night was mother in law's birthday and my almost 4 year old niece did it....you know when they tell you to be careful what you teach children because they will remember AND repeat it? So she's hanging out with my Husby and ask him to pull his finger. He shows his finger to her, she pulls is and asks "You didn't farted!??"

Cherie Amour Finished....or Not

2007-11-07T19:53:00.000-05:00

Last week end I got up to this point:

Pattern: Cherie Amour by Ashley Adams Moncrief

Yarn: Merino Bulky in Lemon y Naranja

Needles: #13/9mm circular - #9/5.5mm circular

Now my dilemna: I'm not sure if I should do the long sleeves like the original pattern or leave it as it is. If I leave is this way I can wear it when it's pretty warm even though the yarn is thick. If I do the long sleeves, I'm worried that I'll have to wear it when it's pretty cold, but then my neck will be exposed...

I guess I'll think about it a little more.

Happy Halloween!!

2007-10-31T18:51:00.000-04:00

Introducing

Louna the Ballerina

Remy the Hippie

I realize that this might only be funny to me but i had a lot of fun tonight with my dogs dressed up...hey no kids over here so we do what we can!

Goodies

2007-10-21T22:01:00.000-04:00

I have been a really bad Secret Pal, not talking much about my Spoiler. I don't know much about her, and I am really looking forward to know more because she is awesome. She stays in touch with me quite often and sends really nice packages!

This package also included some Rasberry cookies.....umm yeah, they're gone!

It's hard to see but this package included some cards, green yar, a magazine with patterns that I will definitely try, a body spray that smells delicious and a nice a practical bag. Thanks Super Pal!!

In other news my Cherie Amour from Knitty is coming along:

I think that this picture shows the colors pretty well. I would have liked to get the yarn in the color that the model is wearing, but they didn't have any in stock, and since I really wanted to buy the yarn RIGHT NOW, I settled with the Naranja y Limon. I like it, I hope that it'll turn out well.

I found out that I really like knitting with Circular Needles. I had never knitted anything with circular needles before and I really enjoy the fact that I can stop knitting at anytime and I don't have to worry about the points falling off the needles. I started knitting it last week end so hopefully I'll finish it quickly.

Eating in Bathroom Stall

2007-10-09T11:12:00.000-04:00

It was my birthday on Sunday so Husby and I took a little trip. On our way home we stopped to eat a bite at Apple.bee's. I went to the bathroom and as I was doing my thing I heard a weird sound, which to me sounded like a baby noise. I thought I was crazy for sure, but heard it again a few seconds later. After thinking that there is surely a camera hidden somewhere and someone is playing a prank on me, I thought "a lady must be feeding her child in there." So as any normal person would, I looked under the door and saw 2 feet and the legs were crossed. She was probably trying to get as possibly comfortable as someone can in a bathroom stall to feed her newborn.

I was irate. How horrible? I dread going in there for 1 minute that it takes me, and she had to sit there for many 20-25 minutes (how long does it take to feed a hungry newborn?) with her baby eating. I was wondering if she thought that it was the polite thing to do, you know hiding as if she was doing drugs or something, or if she was worried that if she fed her child in the dining area she would be thrown out of the restaurant.

I have been hearing about a lot of women being asked to leave places because they refused to stop breastfeeding their infant lately, and although I realize that it is totally unacceptable, seeing this mom having to sit in that bathroom really upset me.

I wonder what could be done. I know that some places are better with it than others, but it would be great if a mom could breastfeed her child everywhere without having to worry about it, because honestly I don't know if I would be up for a fight when my time comes. I also wonder if some moms are not discreet enough and that could maybe cause some problems with patrons trying to eat their dinner. Not that there is anything to be ashamed of, breastfeeding a child is the best thing a mom could do, but I can understand that some people are not interested in seeing a woman's breast when they go shopping.

I have been around breastfeeding moms and you could barely tell that they were doing it, so there is a way to do it so that everyone is happy, baby eating, mom with a quiet child, and people not having to see her breasts. I hope that some kind of law will be put in place that allows women to do what is best for their child, without having to sit in a bathroom stall for 30 minutes while their husband is having dinner by himself.

3 Days

2007-09-27T12:25:00.000-04:00

Here I am right before an event that should be pretty intense and that I'm pretty sure I'll remember. I have been training for a few months for the 3 Day Walk Against Breast Cancer and it's here. I will be walking this coming week-end with thousands of other people to show our support for the research against breast cancer.

Getting to this point wasn't easy by any mean. I had to raise a lot of money and train, which meant waking up early on Saturday mornings and being a party pooper on Friday nights. This is the time when I thank Husby for being patient with me through it all.

I'll be back next week to give an update...I am pretty nervous right now, wondering if I have packed everything I need to camp and walk for 3 days, wondering if my knee that I have injured will behave and worrying about the fact that I haven't walked for 2 weeks because of said knee. I am exciting about what I'm sure will be an intense and very emotional week end.

Wish me luck!!

Something New

2007-09-19T10:59:00.000-04:00

I frustrate myself. I love knitting blogs. Most of the time I don't read the content but just look at the pictures and enjoy. Some knitters are truly amazing...I only hope that one day I could knit like some of them. But this is not what is frustrating me. What frustrates me is that I AM NOT KNITTING.

I keep looking at items that I find beautiful, but I don't take any step towards getting it done...hell I don't even buy the yarn. Well actually that's not true anymore. I found this pretty pattern, don't you think is beautiful? And the name is French! I have bought the yarn for it, which I should receive soon. I know that posting about it will pressure me into starting it, and when I start something my Husby usually complains that I become obsessed, so there is hope that something will be knitted soon!!

Updates soon I hope, and a picture of the first sock of a pair that I never finished....

8 Secrets about me

2007-09-04T21:34:00.000-04:00

I was reading Breast and Belly and decided to do the meme since I read hers...here it is:

Rules: People who are tagged need to write in their own blog these rules & the eight things. At the end of the your blog post, tag six people and list their (blog) names. Leave a comment on their blog telling them they've been tagged and encourage them to read your blog.

1. I dance in front of the bathroom mirror. It's something that I have been doing for a while and I don't really know why, but I always find myself dancing when going to a private bathroom....I never said I was normal.

2. When I see a sign in front of a store, I read all the letters separately and count them.

3. I have scoliosis and flat feet. I was told that one is not related to the other. My back hurts quite often and I have a hard time finding shoes that look good on my feet.

4. I talk in my dreams. Husby tells me that I have conversations in my sleep, and that he can't really tell in which language I am speaking. I remember one time my brother mentionning that I was speaking one night, and when I asked :" Well what did I say?" he replied, "I don't know you do it all the time I can't always listen..."

5. I don't really like talking on the phone. Sure I can spend hours on it with my sister or a really good friend, but if I have the option to see someone, send them an e-mail or call, I'll do it just in this order.

6. I could hold a conversation in 3 languages, French, English and to a lesser extent Spanish.

7. I used to ride a scooter when I lived in France and had an accident. It started raining and didn't know how to turn on wet pavement and slipped. Nothing bad happen except that I was embarassed and pretty frightened.

8. My family has a travelling bug. I have family members in France, England, Canada, US, and Africa, and this is only close family. Somehow we all end up in a different country/continent at one point or another.

I'll do like Breast and Belly, if you read this and feel like revealing some secrets go for it...

Hope

2007-08-20T11:33:00.000-04:00

Warning: Graphic beautiful birth pictures.

This post makes me feel happy and gives me hope. I wonder if there is a Dr. Wonderful in MI!! Thanks Navelgazing Midwife for sharing such a beautiful birth story.

SP11 Questionnaire

2007-08-15T15:08:00.000-04:00

1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like?
I have not had a lot of experience with a lot of different yarns, so I could not name a specific yarn that I like. All I can say is that I can't stand yarn that itches..I really like when the yarn is really soft.

2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in?
Right now my needles and hooks are just in a little box that has nothing special...A pretty box to keep them would be a cool thing to have.

3. How long have you been knitting & how did you learn? Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced?
I learned how to knit as a child. My mom taught me, but I never made anything more than scarves until recently. I have knitted a sweater and realized that I like to be challenged. I have started to knit socks for that reason, but can't seem to finish the pair...I would say that I am intermediate since the challenge doesn't scare me.

I learned how to crochet when I was about 17, and I have made a few items. I have made 2 tanks tops, some booties and a hat for my niece when she was born and I started the blanket that matched the booties and the hat, but never finished it...she is now 3.5 yrs old. I have also made a cool hat for my mom that I lost while on a boat, and I made a purse.

4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list?
Yes, I do have an amazon wish list, but it is under my real name...I would need to re-create it to share it with the world!

5. What's your favorite scent? (for candles, bath products, etc.)
I like mostly flowery scents such as gardenia, lilac, and Jasmine. I really don't like candles that smell like food, like Banana Nut Bread; for some reason it upsets my stomach..

6. Do you have a sweet tooth? Favorite candy?
Husby calls me "Cookie Monster" because I LOVE crunchy cookies like chocolate chip cookies or Oreos.

7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do? Do you spin?
I do not spin, but I have done a Mosaic. I am also working on a cross stich project that I started the day of my husband's bachelor party (we have been married for 3 years.) My Mother-in-law tells me that it'll be ready for my daughter or son's wedding (We do not have any child and aren't planning on starting for a couple of years...)

8. What kind of music do you like? Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD)
I like all kinds of music. I like classical, reggae, R&B, Rock. I don't like Metal, or Country too much. I do believe that my computer can play MP3s.

9. What's your favorite color(s)? Any colors you just can't stand?
I love the color red, and I like orange. There are no particular colors that I can't stand.

10. What is your family situation? Do you have any pets?
I am married with no child. I have 2 dogs. A basset hound whose name is Louna and a Newfoundland whom we call Remy.

11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?
I do wear scarves. I have a couple of hats, but I would like to own more of them. I think that they really add a something to an outfit. I have never owned a poncho or mittens, only gloves.

12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?
So far it's a sock.

13. What are you knitting right now?
I have one sock done in need of the second one. I have started to crochet an outfit for a friend's baby, but I have to redo the pattern since the sizes are only 0 to 3 months and I want to do a 3 to 6..so it might take a while.

14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts?
Yes I do

15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic?
I do not have enough experience to have a preference yet.

16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift?
No.

17. How old is your oldest UFO?
My oldest UFO is still a crocheted purse. I still need to do the lining and I started it around March 2006.

18. What is your favorite holiday?
I think that my favorite holiday is Christmas.

19. Is there anything that you collect?
No, I don't collect anything.

20. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on? What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have?
I do not have any knitting/crocheting magazine subscriptions. I am in search of patterns of sweaters that look good and that don't have endless stockinette rows.

21. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn?
How to knit cables.

22. Are you a sock knitter? What are your foot measurements?
I have knitted one so far! A size 9.5 to 10.

23. When is your birthday? (mm/dd)
October 7th!!

Snapdragon?

2007-06-29T09:46:00.000-04:00

I am a
Snapdragon

What Flower
Are You?

"Mischief is your middle name, but your first is friend. You are quite the prankster that loves to make other people laugh."

Hahaha, I do like to make people laugh!

Happy Honeyversary!

2007-06-04T13:39:00.001-04:00

Three years ago we said "I do". These 3 years went by so fast, maybe because we are doing so well. I love you so much and I am looking forward to all the years ahead of us.

Love,
Bebu

Bill Maher on the French

2007-05-21T08:29:00.000-04:00

I couldn't resist! Thanks Bill Maher.

She Will Always Be With US

2007-02-13T09:02:00.000-05:00

I AM ALWAYS WITH YOU

When I am gone, release me, let me go.
I have so many things to see and do.
You must not tie yourself to me with tears,
Be happy we have had so many years.
I gave you my love and you can only guess
how much you gave me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown
but now it’s time I traveled alone.
So grieve a while for me if grieve you must.
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It’s only for a while that we must part
So bless those memories in your heart.
I won’t be far away, for life goes on.
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can’t see me or touch me,
I’ll be near.
And if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear
all of my love around you soft and clear.
And the, when you must come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile
and say “Welcome Home”.

(I don't know the author)

I love you Fla...

National De-lurking Week!

2007-01-12T12:39:00.000-05:00

I read that it is national de-lurking week...so don't be afraid and let me know who you are! There are not too many of you stopping by and you definitely don't stay long at all, but I'd like to know who you are!

New Package!

2007-01-10T18:25:00.000-05:00

I have received my second package from my Secret Pal! She sent me some sock yarn and the needles to knit them. I have not finished the first sock that I have tried to make, but with new (as opposed to scrap) yarn, I hope that I'll find the inspiration to start making the socks really soon. I am currently working on a poncho for my mom. I am making it in crochet because it's faster for me, but it's still taking a long time.

She also sent me some yummy smelling soap that I am going to have a hard time separating myself from. See my mom gave me an awesomely smelling soap that I have kept in my underwear drawer....I am kind of weird like that. I can see the same kind of future for this soap!

And the chocolate! I love chocolate! Thank you so much Secret Pal!

Finished Sweater

2006-12-30T14:00:00.000-05:00

As promised here is a picture of the finished sweater. As you can see it's a little big, so I wear a turtle neck under it and it's perfect to wear to the park when it's cold, because this sweater is REALLY warm!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Blues?

2006-12-22T21:06:00.000-05:00

We are in the middle of the Holiday Season and yet I don't feel great.

Last Saturday was my gradutation ceremony. Even though I graduated in August I still wanted to walk. I am proud of myself for what I have accomplished and I wanted to be the one that the speakers were congratulating and giving messages of hope to, after having gone to a few commencement ceremonies for friends and family in the past. It was fun. The excitement of the graduates was tangible. But the thing that I was the most happy about was that my mom and her boyfriend were there.

My mom had never visited me in the US before. Not even for my small wedding (not out of bad intention.) I was glad to know that finally she could see my life here in the US. I know that she is proud of me and that she was really excited to be there as well.

We decided to take a trip to Chicago. She loves rythm n' blues and I grew up listening to James Brown, Joe Cocker, Tina Turner, Aretha Franklin and many more. We were set on visiting the House of Blues, but as the evening came closer we found out about a concert at the Blue Chicago that sounded inviting. The concert was AWESOME. It had been a while since I saw a live concert, and having grown up watching my dad play with his band in my native city, it's in my blood and I love it. The musicians were really good and even though it was Sunday night and the bar was pretty empty the atmosphere was really fun.

Now my mom is gone. I know that she had a good time, and I hope that she will come back soon. Now I am preparing myself for a dreaded new year. My sick family member will start a harsh treatment in January. I feel tired, chubby and worried. Maybe I'll wake up feeling better tomorrow but for right now I wish that everybody was healthy and that my mom were here so that I could show her a lot more than is possible in a short week.

I love you Mom.

Men Knit Too!

2006-12-08T08:47:00.000-05:00

Maybe it should become some sort of ritual, but for some reason it's always on Fridays that I find videos cool enough that I want to post them. So here we go for today, a video about men who love to knit that I found at The Laurel Leaf's website!

Have a great week end!

Knitting Progress

2006-11-25T23:26:00.000-05:00

Since it is taking me so long to finish my projects, I decided to show my progress.

First the sock:

I realized that what I like about knitting is novelty and challenge. I started the ribbing which was supposed to be 8 inches long and quickly stopped once I got a good handle of knitting with 4 needles. I figured that the top of the sock could be short and I was excited to start knitting the heel. Now that I am done with the heel and that I have to knit 7 inches in the round non stop...it is taking me a long time to finish. I found the pattern at Kristin's blog.

Now the sweater:

I started with the back

The front was supposed to be like the back, 6 rows of Seed Stitch at the bottom and a V-neck in seed stitch, but the rest was supposed to be plain. As I mentioned previously, I like novelty so I decided to make random columns of seed stitch throughout. It made it more fun to knit.

Close-up of the seed stitch rows.

And finally the sleeves. As soon as I finished my first sleeve my Mother-in-law mentioned that I should have knitted them both at the same time. I'll definitely keep this in mind next time. I just need to finish the last sleeve, and put it together.

I found this pattern in The Yarn Girl's Guide to Simple Knits. An awesome project for a first project. I'll post a picture of me wearing it as soon as I am done.

First Package!

2006-11-16T08:50:00.000-05:00

I just want to write an entry to thank my SP with all my heart. She sent me an awesome package. There was a pattern for a felted hat and all the yarn necessary to knit it. A knitting book, and a Childbirth book! I am so excited about all of it.

I think that my posting will slow down for a while as a family member is sick (read really sick.) I even thought about dropping out of Secret Pal 9, but I need something happy to look forward to and participate in.

Update on Volunteerism

2006-11-07T09:21:00.000-05:00

So Nice Nurse called back on Friday and I set up my training for last night (I have a gmail account with Gmail notifier installed on my computer, so that everytime someone writes to me I know about it RIGHT AWAY coz I'm psycho like that. So when Nice Nurse replied to my e-mail telling me to call her back to schedule the training and I called her back 2 minutes later I think that she kind of freaked!) I went in last night, and of course, there were only 3 babies who needed to be screened.

Young Nice and Pregnant Nurse was training me and it was a lot of fun. It was a little nerve racking to have the parents of a 2 hour old baby stared at you while you hook the baby up and are sweating your butt off partly because you are right by a warmer, and partly because well you have no idea what you are doing.

I signed up to go back on Thursday and Husby is not too happy about that....I had said that I would go only once a week because it is kind of far, and now that I don't have to run to school every night it's nice to spend time with Husby, but I don't feel like I had a chance to really do anything yesterday....still bargaining on this one without trying to look like I am this obsessive freak!

As far as Big Brothers Big Sisters goes, I had my interview today, and the case worker told me that he's hoping that I'll be matched before Thanksgiving! I am excited and nervous about that. I am looking forward to making a difference in a child's life, I just hope that I get along with that child...I'll keep you updated!

Plenty of Volunteering

2006-11-03T08:32:00.000-05:00

Before I graduated I thought that it would be a good thing to volunteer once I have the time. So when during the summer one of my co-workers invited me to a meeting about a non-profit organization, I happily went and have been volunteering for them ever since. The organization's name is the Baby Pantry. They work in collaboration with another organization, Healthy Start/Healthy Families (HS/HF), that is based in a local hospital:

Healthy Start/Healthy Families Oakland is an award winning fully-credentialed collaborative program that provides home visitation services for vulnerable families with infants and young children throughout Oakland County.

The Baby Pantry's role is to provide diapers to the families that are enrolled in the HS/HF program, because they can't be bought with food stamps, or through the WIC Program. I am happy to be involved in this, because it is a brand new endeavor, and we are getting a lot of donations, and we are making a difference.

I was also interested in participating in the Big Brothers Big Sisters program, and I have an interview on Monday!

But if you know anything about me, you know that my passion are pregancies, birth and babies. Well, I contacted a local midwife and offered my help to her. She explained that because of privacy issues she couldn't make me do any kind of clerical work in her practice, and she directed me to a local hospital. I called, and the very kind nurse in charge of volunteers thought that I could be a great candidate to volunteer in the Mother/Baby unit, administering hearing screening to newborns. I had my interview last Thursday, went to the doctors on Monday to get the tests on TB and Rubella which I got back yesterday, and now I am waiting for the nurse to call me back to schedule my training.

I am really excited about this because it will be a very hands on experience, and the babies are between 1 and 2 days old...how adorable is that. I'm hoping that the nurses are nice (the one I saw seemed nice when I went in for my interview) and maybe tell me more about what they think about their jobs and such...Hopefully the nurse will call back shortly!!

Free hug Campaign

2006-10-27T09:08:00.000-04:00

I HAD to post that video, which I found, once again, at IzzyMom's.

>

Have a great week end!

Deeeeetroit Basketbaaaal!

2006-10-25T09:49:00.000-04:00

I have never really been a fan of any kind of sports, but the one thing that I like is to see the local team perform great and be part of the party.

The first time that I really celebrated was in 1998 in the city where I was born, watching the French team becoming the soccer world champion after beating the Brazilian team. I watched the game on a big screen with hundreds of fans, and after the victory the city just exploded. I marched on the streets with some friends and was caught up in the excitement. We danced under a building where a guy had turned his speaker towards the street and created a temporary night club, and we danced in the fountain in the middle of the city...Lots of fun!

I was also really excited when the Detroit Pistons won the 2004 NBA Championship. I sat in my living room watching the games even though I had never been interested in basketball before. And now I am cheering for the Tigers!

And last night I got to go and see the Pistons play. They played against the Washington Wizards and won 101 to 94. I had never been to a basketball game before and I had a ton of fun. I enjoyed being so close to the players, and hearing the excitement in the stands (even though the Palace was pretty empty since the Tigers were playing game 3 of the Playoff.)

Now that I have a little taste of how fun it can be in the stands I have a lot of catching up to do! I'd like to see another Pistons Game and a hockey game should be cool to see.

Knitting!

2006-10-23T22:37:00.000-04:00

So as I mentioned before, I have signed up for Secret Pal 9. My secret pal seems really nice, and I can't wait to discover who she is!

As far as knitting goes, I have found yarn to make my sweater. There is a little craft store called My Craft Room that offers 2 hour classes, which I attended a couple of times. I went in 3 weeks ago and inquired about which kind of yarn I should use for my project. The lady directed me to a $4 yarn skein as she cautioned that it was "nothing special." To be honest, I don't need any fancy yarn to make my very first sweater. Depending on how this one turns out we'll see if it's worth it to splurge next time or just give up!

So far I have knitted the back, one arm, and I have made about 7 inches of the front. See I wish that I could show pictures, but turns out I destroyed our digital camera when I went to Montreal last.... Don't want to write too big, husby is reading and he's not too happy about that. The yarn is red and I have made some decoration on the front with seed stitches. It calls for a hood, but I am not sure if it would look good with a hood...we'll see.

The big news is actually that I have started to knit a sock tonight! With 4 needles and everything. It is coming along nicely, although I am dreading the heel. So my question is, when do you become an intermediate knitter? Do you have to have actually finished a sweater and a pair of socks. I guess as soon as we receive our new camera I'll post a picture of the unfinished sweater and the beginning of my sock and you (yes hundreds of you who read my blog religiously!!) will be the judge. Do I deserve to be called an intermediate level knitter?

True Beauty?

2006-10-18T12:27:00.000-04:00

I was over at Izzy's blog where I stole that video:

Amazing hu? Izzy also has other examples (click on samples) of people who have been touched up, and honestly I think that the natural look is a lot better. At least they look human...

Happy Birthday and Allergic Reaction

2006-10-10T22:28:00.000-04:00

I celebrated my 26th birthday last week end by going out Friday night with my co-workers. We are a handful of young and fun people and I had a blast. The only problem was that I had been fighting a cough for over a week and it was not getting better. It was pretty annoying to not be able to finish a story without starting to choke in the middle of a sentence and then I couldn't stop coughing. Which brings me to the allergic reaction.

Since my cough was not getting better, I went to the doctor's on Friday and he prescribed me some antibiotics. I didn't take it on Friday because I was going out, but I took my first dose Saturday and the second on Sunday. While I was taking my shower yesterday morning I noticed that my armpits were pretty itchy. After I got out my scalp started itching. I noticed throughout the day that my head itched as well as different part of my body, but since I was busy at work I didn't pay too much attention...Until I got home and I noticed the hives. When I tried to go to sleep my whole body was itching so bad that I couldn't sleep.

Husby looked up some information online about the medicine and it said "if you get hives call your doctor immediately." (maybe not exactly like that...) So we did, and he didn't call back until after we had fallen asleep. His recommendation was to get some Ben*dryl and come back in the morning to get a shot. I kept sleeping since I was feeling fine until 3 am, when I woke up feeling so itchy that there was no way I could have gone back to sleep. I had to go get the medicine right away.

I got my shot this morning, but kept scratching ALL day. After work I went back to the pharmacy to get some pills this time and it worked really well. Now it has been 5 hours since I took it, so I am really itchy again. I just took another dose and I am hoping that it'll quickly go away so I can get some decent sleep tonight...

Up until yesterday I always answered "nuting" when docs asked me what I was allergic to...not anymore and i won't forget about it, because I would not want ot have to go through that much itchness ever again.

Ben*dryl has taken effect I can go to sleep now!

Artsy

2006-10-06T08:54:00.000-04:00

I found this cool website here, go check it out. Keep clicking to change colors!

http://www.jacksonpollock.org/

SP9 Questionnaire

2006-10-04T08:52:00.000-04:00

1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like?
I have not had a lot of experience with a lot of different yarns, so I could not name a specific yarn that I like. All I can say is that I can't stand yarn that itches..I really like when the yarn is really soft.

2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in?
Right now my needles and hooks are just in a little box that has nothing special...A pretty box to keep them would be a cool thing to have.

3. How long have you been knitting & how did you learn? Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced?
I learned how to knit as a child. My mom taught me, but I never made anything more than scarves until recently. I have only made hats so far. I am really excited to start learning new points and make cool things, but I have to figure out out to get some cheaper yarn (see my previous post)

I learned how to crochet when I was about 17, and I have made a few items. I have made 2 tanks tops, some booties and a hat for my niece when she was born and I started the blanket that matched the booties and the hat, but never finished it...she is now 2.5 yrs old. I have also made a cool hat for my mom that I lost while on a boat, and I made a purse.

4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list?
Yes, I do have an amazon wish list, but it is under my real name...I would need to re-create it to share it with the world!

5. What's your favorite scent? (for candles, bath products, etc.)
I like mostly flowery scents such as gardenia, lilac, and Jasmine. I really don't like candles that smell like food, like Banana Nut Bread; for some reason it upsets my stomach..

6. Do you have a sweet tooth? Favorite candy?
Husby calls me "Cookie Monster" because I LOVE crunchy cookies like chocolate chip cookies or Oreos.

7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do? Do you spin?
I do not spin, but I have done a Mosaic. I am also working on a cross stich project that I started the day of my husband's bachelor party (we have been married for 2.5 years.) My Mother-in-law tells me that it'll be ready for my daughter or son's wedding (We do not have any child and aren't planning on starting for a couple of years...)

8. What kind of music do you like? Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD)
I like all kinds of music. I like classical, reggae, R&B, Rock. I don't like Metal, or Country too much. I do believe that my computer can play MP3s.

9. What's your favorite color(s)? Any colors you just can't stand?
I love the color red, and I like orange. There are no particular color that I can't stand.

10. What is your family situation? Do you have any pets?
I am married with no child. I have 2 dogs. A basset hound whose name is Louna and a Newfoundland whom we call Remy.

11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?
I do wear scarves. I have a couple of hats, but I would like to own more of them. I think that they really add a something to an outfit.

12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?
So far it's a hat...but as I said, I have not ventured myself into more complicated things yet...

13. What are you knitting right now?
There is a class that meets every Wednesday and I am planning on going today and start a sweater.

14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts?
Yes I do

15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic?
I do not have enough experience to have a preference yet.

16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift?
No.

17. How old is your oldest UFO?
I have started a sweater a long time ago, but I don't plan on finishing it because it is WAY too big, so I guess I don't have any UFO on the knitting front. As far as my crocheting goes, the purse is technically not 100% finished, I still need to do the lining and I started it around March 2006.

18. What is your favorite holiday?
I think that my favorite holiday is Christmas.

19. Is there anything that you collect?
No, I don't collect anything.

20. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on? What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have?
I do not have any knitting/crocheting magazine subscriptions, but I went to B*rnes and N*bles and looked for a book/magazine with patterns for beginners that still look cool and wearable and I had a really hard time finding anything.

21. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn?
I want to learn how to make socks, how to use circular needles.

22. Are you a sock knitter? What are your foot measurements?
See question 21!

23. When is your birthday? (mm/dd)
October 7th!!

National Midwifery Week

2006-10-03T09:11:00.000-04:00

Midwifery is always on the back of my mind. I think about it everyday and it always makes me happy and excited. But as I have mentioned in the past, I am not sure which path to take to achieve my goal.

I have been thinking about doing a nursing degree to become a Certified Nurse Midwife. I love the idea of having a nursing degree to fall back on when I have young children and can't be on call for a while, but you can read the issues that I have about being a nurse here (Interestingly enough I wrote that post almost exactly a year ago.)

Husby has thought in the past about becoming a Physician Assistant. He loves helping people and I think that it would be a great thing for him to do. Since he has a business degree, having all the medical experience to be admitted in the program takes a lot of time and effort, and because we both just graduated, it's nice to get settled and enjoy our new status and save some money before going bankrupt some more.

But since I am considering doing a nursing degree and I am not too thriled about it, we started talking about myself becoming a PA. We are going to go to an informational meeting to see if it's even feasible, but I was reading a book last night that is meant for people to figure out if they are meant to become PA, how to get in etc...and something struck to me.

One of the advices that the book gives is to show your passion when you write your essay and during the interview to be accepted in the program. They explain that even if your grade are not as good as some other applicants, if you really show that you are passionate about the career, they might see this as a being the drive that you need to study one more hour, or read one more book than other less enthusiastic students would...and this is a problem.

The only true passion that I have and that would drive me to go the extra mile and to learn more and more is to learn about how to take care of pregnant women and to eventually being able to see their babies being born. Imagining myself as an OB/GYN's Physician Assistant does not get me all excited, it would only be a mean for me to eventually become a Midwife, and as Husby said, if we pay the amount of money that it takes to do the PA program I don't think that I'll be able to pay again to do a Midwifery degree.

There are a lot of things that I think about doing in the meantime (until I figure out what the heck I am going to do) and I think that doing them might very well help me. I would like to be a lactaction consultant. I think that it would be a great first step. I would definitely enjoy becoming a doula, but I would have to have a long discussion with my boss...I would LOVE to go to a Workshop at the Farm, but I just realized that that would have to wait until May 2007 anyway...

The sad thing is that a year later I am still in the same place regarding midwifery, but I believe that everything happens for a reason, so until I figure out which step I will take next to reach my dream, Happy National Midwifery Week!

Secret Pal 9

2006-09-28T08:50:00.000-04:00

I am really excited. Thanks to My Wooly Nest I found out about Secret Pal 9 and I am going to participate. I think that it is a really neat idea, and I'm sure that I'll have a lot of fun. Hopefully it will force me to knit/crochet a little more, although I have to share the pictures of the hats that I have been making.

I would say that I am pretty good at crocheting, but I am only starting to knit. One thing that I discovered is that yarn is really expensive. I bought a book with some easy patterns to make sweaters and hats. Huby picked a pattern of a sweater for me to make, and I went to the store to buy the yarn...the yarn's name is Manos del Uruguay, it costs about $14 a skein and I need 8 of them...well I am not ready to spend more than a hundred dollars on yarn to make one sweater yet. I need to learn more about yarn to figure out how to get some cheaper yarn that will still do the job.

If you are interested in joining Secret Pal too, I would suggest that you hury because the last day to do so is September 30!

Things in 3 about me

2006-09-20T08:41:00.000-04:00

I've been tagged by Lunacy

Three Things Meme

1. Three people who make me laugh:
Husby
His mom
My sister

2. Three things I can do:
Crochet
Speak 2 languages
Understand a third language

3. Three things I can't do:
Write with my left hand
Go back to school already
Exercise Regularly

4. Three things I'm doing right now:
Blogging instead of working
Listening to the radio
Thinking about making a tea

5. Three things I want to do before I die:
have kids
Travel...a lot
See a birth other than mine

6. Three things I hate the most:
The fact that family members have and willl die
The War
When I can't find anything to wear

7. Three things that scare me:
Death
Not knowing
Bush

8. Three things I don't understand:
Men sometimes
Mean people
Chinese language

9. Three skills I'd like to learn:
To be a good midwife
To Draw
To play an instrument

10. Three ways to describe my personality:
Quiet
Happy
Stubborn

11. Three things I think you should listen to:
Your heart
Your mother
National Public Radio

12. Three things you should never listen to:
Negative People who bring you down
People who don't believe in you
Your mom after you did something wrong

13. Three favorite foods:
Pho
Sushi
Carbs in general

14. Three beverages I drink regularly:
Black Tea
Green Tea
Water

15. Three shows I watched as a kid:
Ninja Turtle (Thanks to my brother)
Happy Days
Little House on the Prairie

16. Three people I'm tagging to do this:
Belly Tales
Vegas Vixen
Erstellen Mutterschaft

New Family Member

2006-08-25T08:53:00.000-04:00

We have a new puppy. His name is Remy for Remington, he is a Newfoundland and he is 10 months old. We went and got him last Thursday, and he is adjusting well.

I was not too excited about getting a dog from a breeder when sooo many dogs need a home, but we tried to do something nice and it bit us in the ass.

A couple of months ago we went to a kennel and started to volunteer. We would go there and take a few dogs at a time for a walk. Since we love dogs, we decided that we could foster one. We brought home a 4 months old pit bull mix, because she was the sweetest thing. She was licking us like crazy and was really adorable. Once at home she met Louna, and she thought that she needed to prove to her that from now on, SHE was the boss. Every chance she had, she would just lounge on Louna and try to bite her...after the 2nd or 3rd time we decided that it was not going to work and we took her back to the kennel heartbroken. We decided that 2 female dogs were not going to work out.

Once at the kennel we met Marco, a male flat coated Retriever who had been at the kennel for way too long. He was actually a little indifferent to us at first, but we decided that we could give it a try. He got along great with Louna. In fact, Louna was the bitchy one (no pun intended!) The only problem we found was that he would not take any crap from any dog at the dog park. He would not attack, but if another dog would smell him the wrong way...he would let that dog know. Everything was going ok....until he got a hold of the cat. Cat was cornered, started to freak out, took off running, the dog runs behind...and gets a hold of it. I forgot to mention that the cat is really small, and the dog was about 90 to 100lbs. The poor cat ended up with a fractured pelvis.

I think that we can say that we gave it a try. If we didn't have Louna, I'm sure that the first dog would have worked out perfectly. If we didn't have a cat, I think that the second dog would have worked out fine. The reality is different, and we didn't want to risk it anymore. Yes Louna has been a little protective of her food with Remy, but other than that everything is going really smoothly.

Graduate!!!

2006-08-17T13:00:00.000-04:00

This summer has been really harsh on me....take 2 classes in the spring and summer semesters which meant that I was in class 4 nights a week. Not the most fun thing to do in the summer, but I am really excited because now I am DONE!!!! .

I took my last exam last Tuesday night. I now have to switch my thinking a bit, because I have had some homework to work on or something to read for the last 4 and a half years that not having A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G to do when I get home from work feels kind of....well weird.

I have to admit that I am pretty proud of myself. Not that having a Bachelor degree requires the mind of a genius, but considering that I arrived in this country 5 years and 10 months ago, English not being my native language and the fact that I worked at least 35 hours throughout my college years (I like saying "college years"!!) I think that I deserve a pat on the back. And since it's my blog I get to brag about stuff.

So a new page of my life has been turned. I did shed a few tears as I walked out of the building. Not that I am going to miss it or anything, I think that it was all the stress of the last few years escaping my body all at once. I am open and excited to whatever life will bring my way as long as Husby, Louna (and maybe Remi??) are in the ride with me.

Shape of a Mother

2006-07-24T09:58:00.000-04:00

I haven't been posting for different reasons, but I feel like that deserves a post.

I found Shape of a Mother a couple of weeks ago. It's a blog where women can post pictures of their bellies before, during and after pregnancies. Not having a child, seeing the pictures shocked me at first, and then I became addicted. The only pictures of pregnant bellies that I had seen prior to this website were free of stretchmarks, or with minimal ones. Now I can see the reality. I can see what what most women's bellies look havlike after ing nurtured a child in it for 40 weeks. It is kind of scary, but at the same time it allows me to know what to expect.

I think that the author should receive some kind of award for allowing women to feel empowered.

Right in Front of Me

2006-06-19T08:33:00.000-04:00

I had a great week end! My sister-in-law who lives in NY decided to surprise her dad, so she flew in and arrived at the house on Sunday afternoon. It was good to see her and her best friend A., because I love those girls, even though I don't get to spend too much time with them, I have a blast every time I see them . I have always been a family type of girl, but with my side of the family being far from me I need these family reunions more than ever. We were all chatting about A being a med student. It is pretty amazing in fact, since she is 24 I believe and will be graduating next year as a doctor. Granted she still has to be an intern and then a resident for 3 years, but she'll be able to practice on her own at age 27! Pretty impressive.

We were asking her all sorts of questions about here rotations, which ones she liked and disliked, and we started talking about her OB rotation. She told us that during her rotation she had caught about 50 babies....that's a pretty big number. I was surprised though, at how A. described a birth. She never mentioned that she was amazed by seeing a baby coming to this world or even talked about how beautiful it must be to see a mom holding her child for the very first time.

She was explaining to us that she had to start every morning at 6am, that she could not leave until the last mom had given birth and that her thoughts after she had gone 2 hours past the time that she usually leaves the hospital, was "Come on....Get that baby out already! I just want to go home....." She was explaining how gross it was to have all the mom's bodily fluids coming out of her...How the mom was screaming to get the child out....and how hot and uncomfortable the clothes that she had to wear, with the mask and protection all over, were.

I understand that it is not everybody's dream to see births and attend women while they give birth. I also understand that it must have been shocking to be asked to catch a baby the first time she attended a birth, but I heard and saw that attitude of impatience that I was suspecting doctor have while waiting for a mom to give birth. I saw why doctors decide to give moms pitocin as soon as possible, because they know for a fact that otherwise, just like A., they'll have to be at the hospital until who knows what time.

This is the reason why I believe that women who are healthy should see a midwife...Somebody who is committed to births, somebody who knows that it will take hours and hours for the child to come and who is ok with that.

Pictures of Trip

2006-06-09T21:29:00.000-04:00

As promised, here are some pictures from our camping trip:

Frankfort, Michigan.

Downtown Frankfort!

No comment!

On our way to Lake Michigan.

Amost there!

Louna Tanning by the lake Michigan

We found a trail to go off-roading and the sight of these trees was pretty amazing.

On Platte river.

Louna chilling by the bonfire.

A huge moth attached to a screen. Pretty amazing.

The sunset in Frankfort...beautiful!

Going Camping!

2006-06-02T10:52:00.000-04:00

We are leaving this afternoon to go camping in the northern part of Michigan...I can't wait! The last time that we went camping was 2 years ago, so it's been a while. It was that time that we found our dear Basset Hound Louna. She was just crossing the street with no collar around her neck and nobody seemed to be looking for her...We told the park ranger that we had her in case somebody asked, but nobody came. I like to think that she was sent to us. We had been talking about adopting a dog a few months prior to finding her so the timing was perfect. She is a gift, she is the sweetest and most special dog ever (maybe because she is my first dog!)

This week end will be the first time that we go camping with her. I hope that she'll love it. I also hope that she won't puke in the car the whole way there...When we first found her, we couldn't go in the car for more than 3 minutes without her throwing up. I heard that some dogs have motion sickness, but I always thought that it was mainly the intense fear that we were taking her somewhere to abandon her that made her sick, and indeed as trips to dog parks became more frequent her puking almost stopped. But we have never driven for 4 hours with her in the car...We are planning on taking her to the park and making her tired before hitting the road...Hopefully that'll do it.

We are practically all packed up and really excited. Hopefully I'll be able to post some pictures of our trip next week. Have a great week end!

Great Publicity for Midwives

2006-06-01T14:45:00.000-04:00

Here is an article that I found on CNN:

Midwives delivering more babies

(AP) -- Instead of a conventional hospital birth, Heidi Teeple and her husband, Rod, brought baby Logan into the world while soaking together in a freestanding tub of warm water in their living room, with a fire in the fireplace and two midwives at their side.

"It was great," said Heidi Teeple, who lives in San Anselmo, California. "It was much more relaxing. There was no anxiety about when to go to the hospital. I called the midwives; they came. They were both very calm and soothing."

The Teeples are part of a small but growing contingent of people choosing to give birth with midwives, caregivers who view birth as a natural, rather than medical, experience, and one that should be tailored to a mother's needs.

The trend has been slow but steady in coming.

According to data from the National Center for Health Statistics for 2003, the most recent year for which data are available, 8 percent of pregnant women in the United States gave birth with a midwife compared with 4 percent in 1990. Births attended by a certified nurse midwife, for example, have risen every year since 1975.

Laws governing midwifery vary from state to state, as does insurance coverage of midwife-assisted births.

Generally, many insurers cover midwife care -- provided she is licensed according to state law and works in a hospital or approved birthing center. Not all midwives are certified nurses; those who aren't are sometimes referred to as lay midwives. Insurance coverage is spottier for those midwives who are not certified nurses, or who assist home birth or otherwise work outside the traditional hospital setting.

But choosing a midwife is about more than merely selecting a care provider or deciding between birth at a hospital or home. It represents a shift in how a woman approaches pregnancy, advocates say. Although certified nurse midwives are licensed to administer medication, they generally encourage a drug-free birth and rely primarily on natural methods of care.

At the core, it's a rejection of the quintessential birth scene: the pregnant woman lying in a single bed, a nurse at the ready with a pain-relieving epidural anesthetic and a hospital room full of people yelling "push!"

Still, with pregnancy and birth having some of the highest costs in medical care, families do need to consider whether a midwife's services will be covered.

WellPoint Inc., the nation's largest health insurer, said its coverage of midwifery varies by locality and health plan.

Aetna Inc. said it contracts with midwives who assist deliveries in hospitals or birthing centers but does not cover planned home births, except in New York and Washington or elsewhere in the world where law requires coverage. One of the insurer's global plans covered 80 percent of Heidi Teeple's pregnancy and birth, she said.

UnitedHealth Group Inc. said it covers both hospital and home births with a licensed midwife. Benefits are generally the same for a woman who chooses a physician and hospital as for a woman who prefers a midwife and home birth.

"If you are a consumer, you need to ask if there are midwives in a given market's network," spokesman Roger Rollman. "Some have midwives, and some do not."

In some parts of the country, access to midwife care has been hampered by the rising cost of malpractice insurance. In order to curb costs, some obstetric practices have laid off their midwives in order to save on overhead expenses.

Where midwives are available, the cost of a midwife-attended birth varies by place and practitioner.

"When we were first looking at the cost, it was a lot less to deliver with a midwife," said Christine Louden, a West Hartford, Connecticut, mother who had her two boys with midwives. "Cost didn't motivate our decision but we saw the cost and thought, 'Wow.' But the decision was definitely motivated by belief systems."

Couples who give birth with a midwife describe the experience with words like "soothing," "romantic" and "calm."

During her labor, the midwives "didn't say much at all," said Heidi Teeple, 31. "As it got closer, they made sure things were going right. It was very empowering to feel like I was doing it on my own."

In a separate conversation, Rod Teeple, who is 41, echoed his wife and said having the midwives there more than anything gave him confidence. He called Logan's birth "the most smooth, amazing experience," one that was "very private."

Some women say part of the draw of midwifery is the freedom to give birth wherever and however they choose.

Rachel Ledoux, a 27-year-old mother from Chicopee, Massachusetts, said she spent a good deal of her labor in the hospital room's shower -- with the midwife periodically getting in with her to check her progress. Louden, 36, gave birth to her son in a king-sized bed in a birthing center with her husband, David, lying beside her.

"Midwives let women be in whatever position they want to be in -- on their hands and knees on the floor, squatting, in a tub," said Susan Hodges, president of the advocacy group Citizens for Midwifery. "Without signs of a real medical problem, birth should actually be more hands-off than it is.

Messed up...

2006-06-01T08:30:00.000-04:00

I read Milliner's Dream's blog and as I was reading this post the other day and mentioned it to my friend and co-worker L, she told me that one of her old roommate was friend with one of the girls who had passed away in the accident. It was a strange coincidence...

Well, it turns out that the girl who was believed to have died in a car accident was actually in the coma. The 2 girls' identities were mistaken and as the girl who woke up from the coma started talking, the family who was taking care of her realized that something was wrong...They finally realized that their daughter was the one who had passed away, and they were taking care of their daughter's friend....L hasn't arrived at the office yet, but I wonder if she even knows about it!

The family who thought that their daughter was in the coma had been writing a blog about how their "daughter" was recuperating...it is really heart breaking to see how they realized that it was in fact not their daughter...

My Very First Interview!

2006-05-20T10:16:00.000-04:00

I am excited to have been chosen to do my very first meme...the only reason I have been chosen is because I volunteered myself!! ha ha Calliope has asked me five questions that I need to answer:

1. Have you ever written or wanted to write a fan letter? Who was / would it be to?
No, I have never written a fan letter, but if I did it would probably be to Ina May Gaskin. She wrote the first book that I ever read about midwifery and it was a revelation. I really admire her for what she does. I saw her a year ago at Michigan State University giving a speech for International Midwives Day. I love the fact that if women would take the time to listen they would realizer that everyhting that she says makes sense, she has a great sense of humor, and she is a very strong woman in every sense of the word.

2.What was the 1st cd you ever bought?
My first CD? I can't remember, but one big moment of my life was when I bought the vinyl disc of New Kids on the Block! I believe it was for the song "Step by Step." Those were the times!!

3.In the big screen movie version of your life who plays you? Who plays your s/o?
I have been thinking about this question for a couple of days, and I think that the couple in "King of Queens" could play our parts. Their characters seem like they could be a couple in real life; They are really funny, they sometimes argue, but they also seem to be deeply in love with each other. I like the way they interact with each other.

4. What made you decide to become a midwife?
I realized that I was really interested in pregnancy and birth by watching Discovery Health Channel and their show Birth Day. I have goosebumps and a little tear everytime the child is born! I am annoyed when I watch it now that I know more about the process, because of the high level of often unnecessary interventions that are being offered, or more often just performed, to the women giving birth. After reading books and websites, I realized that I would love to be a part of this miracle that happens every second somewhere in the world.

5. How have you changed or shifted since you moved to America?
I have definitely changed since I moved to the U.S. I was really not motivated when I was in France. I had graduated from high-school and wasn't sure what career to pursue, and so I just took small jobs as cashier and such (In France, a student has to decide what career they want to pursue as soon as they come out of High School, because this dictates what univesrity they are going to attend....It is really hard to know at 18 what you want to do for the rest of your life, so many students end up waisting time going to school for something that they'll eventually abandon, or just like me, delay their studies to later), and I am really not sure what I would have been up to if I had stayed. Here I have become a really motivated young woman. After a little more than 5 years in this country, I will be graduating with a Bachelor degree in Science in August! I think that it has a lot to do with the environment that I am in....but I'll keep all this for a later post...

If anybody has made it this far and wants to play along, here's how:

Leave me a comment saying “Me Next, Me Next!.” The first five (or so) commenters will be the participants.
I will respond by asking you five questions.
You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions.
You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions

The Evolution of Dance

2006-05-12T10:50:00.000-04:00

I found this video at Midwiffle Seed's blog....be ready to laugh!

The Evolution of Dance by Judson Laipply.

Celebrating Midwives and Moms

2006-05-11T09:15:00.000-04:00

When I first met Shawn (the writer of the birth story and founder of the birthNETWORK) we talked about setting up an event to celebrate International Midwife Day and Mother's Day. So during the last 2 or 3 months we have been brainstorming via e-mails and getting the event ready, which will be happening this Friday. I am really happy to feel like I am a part of it. Yesterday night was the final meeting to make sure we'll have everything we need by Friday and Shawn made sure that I was able to be there.

I am really looking forward to it, there will be a fashion show of pregnant women, a photo presentation, mini-massages will be given during the whole event, a movie called "Totally Birthing Barbie" will be shown, and a lady will be singing/reading poems. We have no idea how many people will show up, but even if there aren't too many people we'll have fun.

To get this event ready I have been trying to get people to donate things. I have to admit that I got nutin! I tried to get a free room....I failed! I tried to get flowers donated.....I failed! I was supposed to find pregnant women who would want to do the fashion show.....I failed! I realize now how hard it is to be a non-profit organization and get people to want to help you get your message out.

A really interesting thing is happening though. I am taking my very first Marketing class this semester. This is a class that people usually take when they are Juniors...I am graduating in 4 months! This professor makes the students write a marketing plan for a company. The person in charge of the marketing department from a company that professor chooses comes to the class and gives a speech about what their marketing goals are, their timeline and who they are trying to reach....At the end of the semester the person comes back to listen to the students' presentation and maybe even get some interesting ideas from them.

It so happened that the company that my professor chose for us this semester is "Big Brothers Big Sisters", a non-profit organization! I am excited and I hope that I will learn enough to even give some inputs and help the birthNETWORK be more successful! I think that it's funny how things happen. It might sound silly, but I am taking this as a sign. A sign that I am going in the right direction.

Happy International Midwife Day!

2006-05-05T14:57:00.000-04:00

I would like to take this day to thank all the midwives around the world who make the birthing community a better place! Hopefully one day I'll be one of them!

Beautiful Birth Story

2006-04-27T14:54:00.000-04:00

I really haven't been posting as much as I wish I would. This might have to do with the fact that within the last week I have finished a semester, moved, and started another semester!

Anyway, the founder of the birthNETWORK has had really interesting experiences when it comes to giving birth. She wrote the birth story of her last daughter, which also describes her other birth experiences, and she allowed me to post it here. It is long but soooo worth it. Enjoy!

I am still in awe when I consider Thursday, September 9, 2004. “Beautiful…magical,” is how our nine-year-old daughter Bailey described it. And I would add, nothing short of miraculous.

To get the full effect, I should back up ten years to describe a time in my life that was bittersweet.

Of course, there isn’t much that compares to the joy of welcoming a new baby. We were thrilled when Bailey (1995) and Jacob (1998) were born healthy into ours.

But with each pregnancy--after hoping, dreaming and praying--my desire to give birth naturally was met with great disappointment.

Both my first daughter and son were born by “emergency” cesarean section due mainly from my fears and inadequate care.

I had labored with both, 24 and then 18 hours. My daughter Bailey was wedged in a posterior (face up) position after the doctor broke my water. Eyes nearly swollen shut from pushing for two hours and still no baby, I consented to the surgery.

The second c-section was harder because I had done even more “homework” during this pregnancy, confident that a vbac (vaginal birth after c-section) was possible.

But after three hours of pushing I was told my pelvis was too small (this was news to me after years of gynecological exams), so I consented to another c-section.

I now know both of those surgical births were preventable, but at the time, I was left feeling confused: why didn’t natural birth work for me?

Many consoled: be happy, you have a healthy baby, not everyone can have a natural birth. “What would be the point in being a martyr anyway, going through that pain just to have an experience of vaginal birth?” was the judgmental tone I caught from others, pitting my desire for a satisfying journey against my ultimate destination as mother.

I was made to feel guilty and selfish for caring about how my baby was born. But as the rest of the story will tell, one non-profit consumer advocacy group and two children later, I can say with all confidence: it is not selfish to care how women and babies are treated during pregnancy and birth!

After Jacob’s birth, I was determined to help others avoid the experience I had. Because I was pressured by the doctor and midwife to give birth by their protocols, my body shut down (dystocia)—labor “stalled” in an effort to protect me and my baby.

“You better cooperate or your baby could die,” were the last words of the doctor before I consented to surgery.

Eighteen months later, energized by a desire to help others avoid similar experiences, I had gathered four like-minded friends and started a grassroots consumer group called birthNETWORK (see www.birthnework.org), for anyone seeking information and support for healthy pregnancy and birth.

Three months later my husband and I learned we were expecting our third child in the fall of 2000! As my belly grew, so did birthNETWORK. Prospective parents, expectant parents and childbirth professionals gathered monthly to connect and learn more about “mother-friendly” care (see www.motherfriendly.org).

That pregnancy was very different. I chose to forgo conventional care after I learned through birthNETWORK that the most up-to-date research proves that obstetricians are in fact NOT the experts in normal birthing care… midwives are. The U.S. is one of the only industrialized nation NOT choosing midwives over doctors.

I found a caregiver who was fully trained in the science and art of birthing care. She spent a half hour or more with me each visit, instead of the typical five minutes I had gotten with previous providers.

Over the course of the pregnancy, she met my physical AND emotional needs. She told me the pros and cons of various tests and interventions and let us decide on many facets of our care. Her skills and attitude met my husband’s litmus test for safety: she knew all about normal birth and she knew when things were outside her scope.

Having had two previous c-sections did not, as most people assume, risk me out. I am healthy and have a normal pelvis. And as I learned and was soon to see for myself: babies come out! Even big babies, for Aaron, born October of 2000, was my biggest baby yet at 9 lb. 10 oz. My pelvis wasn’t too small after all!

He was born into my arms after four arduous hours of pushing and a lot of help from my midwife. Did I mention he was born in our bedroom? Yes, a vbac at home! “Weren’t you afraid?” many people asked. Never. I was confident in my body’s ability to do what it was designed to do and, for the first time, I had surrounded myself with others who were too.

My determination and choice of caregiver paid off. Sadly, it’s nearly impossible to find an insurer that will pay for this excellent care, even though studies show how good it is for moms and babies. Though it required saving and sacrifice, our care was well worth the out-of-pocket expense.

So when my husband and I learned we were expecting our fourth child sometime in late summer 2004, we started putting money aside for our next homebirth.

Our children (Bailey, 9; Jacob, 6 and Aaron, 3) enjoyed watching me grow and feeling their baby brother or sister move. We chose not to have an ultrasound and did not know the gender. They patiently waited for this child to be born. I reveled in the joy of it all, treasuring this as most probably my last pregnancy.

Preparations were in place, my birth kit ready and midwife on alert. We had begun our home school year in late August knowing we would be pleasantly interrupted at any time. The anticipation was so exciting…any moment the birthday party would begin!

The morning of September 9 started like most weekdays: my best friend Suzi and I went for our one-mile walk at 5:30 a.m. Though I had been slowing down, I kept up pretty good that day. When I returned, my husband Scott was getting ready to leave for work.

As I had been saying for two weeks now, “Today might be the day!” I did add: “Don’t be surprised if I call you to come home.” Little did he know the surprise that would await him upon arriving home later that day.

After he left, I went downstairs to do some e-mail. As I sat there, I felt labor begin. I heard Jacob’s feet shuffling around upstairs looking for me. We went back to my bed and cuddled for 45 minutes until I heard Aaron wake up, “I want Mommy!”

I had been having regular contractions—definitely active labor now because it was getting harder to lie still during them. “Please go tell Bailey to get Aaron,” I asked Jacob. “Mommy can’t…the baby is going to come today.”

Jacob ran excitedly to his sister who quickly roused when she realized that something big was happening. All three came into my room to find me pacing.

Around 7:50 a.m., I called Scott and Bridgett, the midwife. I also called Suzi and my cousin Debbie who planned to be at the birth. They were all on the way.

Ten minutes later I realized how fast everything was going—waves every two to three minutes—and I began to get shaky. I called Bridgett again, “I want to see your face soon,” I told her.

At 8:15, on my knees with my head hanging over the sink, I had an unmistakable urge to push. I then moved directly to the bed onto my hands and knees, opening my legs wide. The next contraction came and a power within surged, causing me to bear down automatically.

Bailey became aware that I was pushing the baby out. Upset, she asked, “Mom, can’t you wait for Daddy?!”

“No, Bailey. I can’t stop this,” I answered.

“But I’m afraid,” she replied.

Hanging my head as I rested between pushes I answered, “Honey, you can leave the room if you want to, I’ll understand.” But she stayed. Later she told me she prayed for God to help her. She got towels to put under me and reassured me that I was far enough on the bed for baby to land safely.

“Thank you for being here Bailey,” I confided.

The boys were waiting outside for their Dad to arrive. Aaron paced the deck outside our bedroom and Jacob waited at the end of the driveway.

As the baby began to crown Bailey described, “It doesn’t look like a head, it’s kind of green.” I guessed the baby had passed meconium, a bowel movement, which can be a sign of fetal distress. My brain was on autopilot—it did not allow thoughts or fears to interfere with the work at hand.

Two more pushes and as the head began to emerge Bailey called to her brothers to come see. Aaron yelled to his brother--and the whole neighborhood, “The head’s out Jake!”

Jacob ran into the bedroom, joining his siblings. He reached out and touched what he now describes as a “bald, wet and soft” head about to be born. Because I was on my hands and knees, the baby was facing up, looking at them.

The urge to push was so powerful, but not overwhelming. I felt the baby fill me and move through me. As the head and then the shoulders came out, I felt what many moms describe as “the burn”. It was amazing. I could feel my body stretch to accommodate this life about to be born.

One more push and I felt a wet body slither out of me. “Bloop,” is how Bailey described it as her hands cushioned the baby’s descent to the bed. She immediately cried, “Momma, it’s a girl! I have a sister.” Her dream come true!

I turned around and she handed the baby to me. We swaddled her on my chest with a towel and I wiped the meconium from the corner of her lips. I lay back on some pillows and beheld her. Serenity. Peace. Her quiet eyes opened and we gazed. Love. As birth anthropologist Sheila Kitzinger poetically describes, “it’s as if all the reeling planets come to a sudden stop.” Our star had arrived.

As Scott pulled in the driveway, the boys met him exclaiming, “The baby’s here!” He thought they were teasing, until Bailey ran around the corner with tears streaming down her face, “Daddy, it’s a girl. I have a sister!” He knew this was no joke.

Scott walked in to find me with our daughter Isabella Marie, five minutes new to the world. “Wow,” pretty much sums up his response as he gawked in disbelief. He joined us on the bed in time to help deliver the placenta five minutes later, after Bella began to nurse.

Aaron came running into the bedroom with our kitchen utility scissors. “Time to cut the cord!” he exclaimed. We laughed and told him we’d wait for Bridgett to bring the sterile ones. She arrived to find that she wasn’t the only one who missed the birth due to morning rush hour traffic.

This event generated quite a lot of attention after my mother-in-law called the local media the same morning. Between newspaper, television and radio reports we all got a fair share of our “15 minutes of fame”, but Bailey attracted the most inquiries as the eldest birth attendant.

When asked, “What were you thinking?” she paused and answered that she was glad there was no one there to boss her around and tell her what to do. Immediately, I could relate with that sentiment.

Not that my husband or midwife would have been “bossy”, but that the presence of adults would have changed the chemistry of this birth—literally and figuratively. It’s not hard to imagine how a sterile room full of strangers (residents, nurses, housekeeping) might affect a labor; I now see how it did with my first two births.

How did this labor last less than two hours when the previous ones were 24, 18 and 12 hours respectively?! I figured on at least six hours of labor this time. Obviously, Bella had a different timetable. Completely uninhibited, she and my body did what they were designed to without impediment.

Birth is such a primal instinct, etched into the memory of a woman’s body since the beginning of time. Bella’s birth has made me consider the impact that the presence of others has on a woman’s ability to birth.

At one time, women labored alone or just with other women to attend. But as society became more “advanced” women have come under the influence of “experts”, machines (monitors, etc.) and drugs? My experience of birthing with only a young girl to attend me has profoundly changed how I think about birth.

Certainly, many might say, “You were lucky…but what if something went wrong?” But nothing did. Why is it, I wonder, that something did go “wrong” during my previous births when I was surrounded by people? It’s likely that things go awry more often when people are standing around “just in case” they do.

My heart cries out to the millions of women that have been and will be bossed, rushed, intimidated, humiliated and mistreated during what should be the most special and spectacular moment of their lives. How different birth would be if women really trusted that it is safe because it is, not because someone else makes it so.

I didn’t plan to have an unassisted birth. It just happened that way. God definitely answered our prayers for a safe and swift delivery. The whole family will remember this miraculous birth, but Bailey, Bella and I will share a special bond, greater than anything we could have asked for or ever imagined.

The Dulaan Project

2006-04-21T14:55:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Erika I found out about the Dulaan Project.

A non-profit organization asks for people to send them out hand-knitted (I'm sure that hand crocheted will be fine!!) hat, socks, mittens, neck gaiters, scarves and sweaters for them to send to Mongolia, where it can get -40 at night. It will allow kids to go to school without litteraly freezing their butts off. All jokes put aside, it only takes me a couple of hours to knitt a hat, and it could make a big difference in someone's life, so I decided that I'll crochet a couple of items and send them out.

If you check out their website and realize that it is from 2005, I contacted them to make sure that they are still doing it this year, and they replied promptly letting me know that indeed, they will be sending the items out by July 15 of this year.

Photo Friday - Shadow

2006-04-16T19:35:00.000-04:00

The theme for the last photo Friday was Shadow. I looked back at my old experimental pictures and found one that was perfect for that theme.

Summer Bag

2006-04-15T21:27:00.000-04:00

I haven't posted for a while...the end of the semester is upon me and a lot of things are happening. But here is my latest crochet project. It took me about 10 days to finish it. The handle is actually not sown yet, but I am happy with the way it looks.

Battle of the Bands part II

2006-03-28T10:33:00.000-05:00

Our friends won the Battle of the Bands! It was pretty amazing how much support they received from the crowd.

CONGRATULATIONS SECOND NATURE!!

Photo Friday - Get your Spring on

2006-03-24T13:20:00.000-05:00

Unfortunately I woke up to a snowy day today, not the best to post a picture of what makes me think of Spring.

Instead I decided to post a picture of a lily that Husby got me a while ago. I really like that photo and nothing says spring like flowers blooming on the side of the road.

Please do not try to start the car again...

2006-03-22T16:04:00.000-05:00

So last Saturday we took the car to the dealership to see how much we could get for it by turning it in. We went to the dealership with my 2000 Ford Focus, but I couldn't stay outside with Husby and the salesperson when they were going around the car, because I felt so bad.

Silly me was scared that the sales guy would ask things like:

Salesperson:"so what happened to the back door?"
Me: "It just stopped opening one day..."
SP: "what about the mirror?"
Me: "A piece of tire flew towards me on the highway one day scaring the crap out of me and it hit my mirror and almost took it off..."
SP: "What about the remote car opener?"
Me: "Dunno...stopped working"
SP: "Does it run fine?"
Me: "When it wants to..."

But instead he just went around and made sure that there were no scratches on the paint...

While the salesperson went to talk to his manager I asked Husby if he had tried to start the car...he did and it started TWICE! (Just as a side note, we went to the not good side of downtown Detroit 3 weeks ago and at 2 in the morning when we were thinking about heading home the car had another plan in mind...then it started again 2 days later, took me to my university only to let me hanging in the parking lot when it was time to go home...hence the frustation)

The guy came back and offered us $100 more than what Kelley Blue Book said we should expect for this car in fair condition! Needless to say I just wanted to grab the check and run...But we couldn't get the check until this week, because the "check lady" was out and we needed one paperwork. I freaked out once again when he offered to move the car to the service department and keep it there for the week-end....Please staaaaaaaaaart, was what was going through my head.

We still haven't gone to pick up the check, and since they didn't have the key there is no way that they could have figured out anything new since Saturday, but somehow, I feel like something bad might happen and they might realize what a piece of junk that car is....

Picture Friday

2006-03-18T22:14:00.000-05:00

I celebrated St Patrick's day with some co-workers at a local restaurant and we had a little too much green beer for me to be able to post my pictures on Friday...

This week's pics were supposed to be picture of our childhood, so here you go. I totally blame my mom for my weight. :-) Can you see how big of a baby I was! I really like the picture of my brother and I on the matress. The wallpaper is awesome, so 80's. Some people say that I still look like on the picure in my red and blue dress, to give you an idea.

Getting Involved

2006-03-13T08:42:00.000-05:00

I am really excited. I went to the North Oakland chapter meeting of the birthNETWORK last Thursday and started talking to one of the leaders about volunteering. She was thinking that we could put something together for International Midwives Day on May 5th. I am really happy to be finally able to meet people who believe in the same thing I do, to be involved in my community and try to educate women about their choices when giving birth.

I will be putting up fliers and contacting people at my University to see if we could use one of their rooms for the event. I was really happy to see that the Michigan's governor, Jennifer Granholm, proclaimed May 5 as Midwife Day in our state, which is a good start I think.

More on the Midwife day event later...

Meltdown

2006-03-08T10:32:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was emotionally draining....I guess! I can say that I haven't spent one day without thinking of my dad since he passed away in April 2004. I don't talk about him too often as it is still really painful and I just can't bring it up randomly.

Yesterday I was talking with on of my co-worker (L) about how being at work is not good when one has some bad news about personal matters. Talking about that took me right back to the day I called the hospital where my dad had just had surgery, to make sure that he was OK and was told that he was in critical conditions....they couldn't really say at that point...This was a big shock and being at work and having to hide my emotions didn't make it any easier.

Husby and I watched "Walk the Line" last night, which by the way is a really good movie, but it upset me. If anyone has seen both "Walk the Line" and "Ray", I am sure that you can see pattern with the cheating, the alcohol, the drugs...it is just the way it is for people in that kind of environment. My dad was a musician, it was his job. He was around alcohol all the time and drank too much. I don't know about drugs and I don't want to know...I am pretty sure that he never cheated on my mom though. My dad never recovered from his surgery because his liver was really damaged and his patelets were low. Anyway, watching this movie made me mad at the whole thing.

I didn't really put everything together (the discussion at work plus the movie) until I went to bed though, when I started thinking about my dad's death. I started replaying the days preceding it with all the worrying, the sadness, the unknown...and I can still feel everyhing as if it was yesterday. I started crying and couldn't stop. It was not a few tears rolling down my cheeks, it was very very emotional...I haven't cried like that in a long time. I was alone in bed and didn't want to annoy Husby as there is not much he can do about it, I just needed to get it out of my system.

Battle of the Bands part I

2006-03-07T13:57:00.000-05:00

One of Husby's best friend plays in a band. He is the guitarist and lead singer of a band that was created about 3 months ago. Last Saturday was the "semi-finals" of a battle of the bands that they had been selected to compete in in Detroit. The band that would get cheered and clapped the loudest would win the semi-finals and get to play for the finals.

We arrived early and it was really fun, because a LOT of friends showed up. Since 3 out of the 4 musicians are Argentinian, they have that really warm personality and they were all able to bring a ton of people. As the first band started to play, we were kind of wondering if they were going to get any feedback from the crowd at all considering that it was a competition.

Needless to say our friends won. They will be playing again on the 25th of March. The 1st prize is a 5 song recording with a professional studio and some instruments so I really hope that they win. I am pretty confident that a lot of people will be showing up again and at the very least we'll have a good time.

Happy Birthday...I miss you so so much

2006-03-01T08:37:00.000-05:00

55 years ago on Sunday, a little boy was born in the city of Marseille, France. He was one of the sweetest and funniest man I know and he definitely left too early. I could talk for hours with him about anything and everything and I know how much he loved us.

I love you daddy and I can't express how much I miss you, happy birthday.

Winter Pictures

2006-02-21T19:15:00.000-05:00

Seizure?

2006-02-21T16:53:00.000-05:00

My poor doggie is acting weird...her teeth have been chattering when she closes her mouth and she keeps licking the air....Husby called the vet today and they said that she might be having seizures...my poor Louna. I am worried about her, I hope that she will be getting better soon.

Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife

2006-02-20T09:56:00.000-05:00

I finished reading Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife by Peggy Vincent and I really liked it.

Since I am not too good at summarizing books, here is how Amazon describes it:

In a joyous, often hilarious ode to the Birkenstock-scuffling, tackle box-toting mobile midwives who flourished in the 1980s, Peggy Vincent chronicles her abundant life as a professional Baby Catcher.
The wild ride begins during her nurse training years in the 1960s, when laboring women were expected to lie down, shut up, and submit to whatever drugs and procedures the doctor ordered. A rebellious patient who chants and dances through her contractions--and the hell that ensues when seasoned hospital staffers intrude--lights a permanent fire under Vincent. .
Her resolve to serve each laboring woman with compassion and respect carries her from obstetrics nurse to head of an alternative birth center within Alta Bates Hospital in Berkeley, California, and eventually into her own private practice as a licensed midwife.
Like the most courageous home births, this collection of delivery experiences refuses anesthesia: plenty of bellowing, sweating, bleeding, and pushing accompany nearly all of the more than 40 tales. Tough confrontations with stubborn physicians, panicky labor partners, and one particularly nasty calico cat are dabbed with as many keen insights as Vincent's quieter, more heart-rending newborn encounters.
Baby Catcher is an inspirational literary gift suitable for expectant mothers, fellow baby catchers, and anyone who loves reading about nature's greatest magical feat.

It's a great book that I certainly recommend.

Poem

2006-02-09T14:28:00.000-05:00

Learn to respect this sacred moment of birth,
as fragile, as fleeting, as elusive as dawn.
The child is there, hesitant, tentative,
unsure which way he's about to go.
He stands between two worlds.
For heaven's sake don't touch him,
don't push him,
unless you want him to fall.
Let him wait until he feels the time is right.
. . . . . . . . . . . . .
Can you say when he left one kingdom for the other?
It is so subtle, the eye can hardly catch it.
As subtle as stepping in,
or out, of time,
to be born,
or to die.
. . . .
Let him be.
Just wait.
This child is awakening
for the very first time.
This is his first dawn.
Allow him its grandeur, its majesty.
Don't even stir until he leaves behind
the night and its kingdom of dreams.

Frederick Leboyer in Birth without Violence

Upsetting Article

2006-02-09T08:28:00.000-05:00

I read an upsetting article courtesy of Navelgazing Midwife called C-sections are increasingly used by choice, not necessity.

Just to give you an idea I selected some parts of it that summarize it pretty well:

"Meanwhile, some research has suggested that vaginal delivery creates its own risks and that C-sections help women avoid incontinence and other health problems down the road. "
"Even newer studies are beginning to compare the risks of vaginal delivery not with emergency C-sections, as most previous research has done, but with planned surgical deliveries. C-sections are safer, some researchers are finding, without the last-minute rush to surgery after an exhausting trial of labor."

"In the United States, the overall infant mortality rate is 6.9 per 1,000 babies; the maternal mortality rate is 11.8 per 100,000 live births, and estimates are that a C-section more than doubles the mother's risk of death."

"But in the overwhelming majority of childbirths in the United States, mother and baby do just fine, regardless of the method of delivery. "
"The increase in elective C-sections comes amid a rise in C-sections overall. In 2004, close to 30 percent of all births were caesarean, up from about 20 percent in 1996. "

Just for your information, there are about 20 countries that have a lower rate of maternal death than the US, so when I read that "the overwhelming majority of childbirths in the US, mother and baby do just fine" it make me cringe. As long as the "majority" does "just fine" everything is ok then? I would assume that the US being such a technologically advanced country the standards would be set a little higher...

I understand that I am not quoting a medical journal here, but that's the problem. The problem is that any young woman can read this article and think that it's ok then to just ask a C-section to deliver her baby instead of trying to deliver her child vaginally. I honestly think that giving birth is a rite of passage, you become a mother, and it comes with efforts and sacrifices. If you are not willing to even try to go through the pain of labor, are you really ready to take onto the responsibility of having a child?

Dream

2006-02-06T09:27:00.000-05:00

I had a weird dream last night!

I was about to give birth, but it seems like I just noticed that I was pregnant. I remember feeling like I didn't want to annoy anybody, but I was pissed because I knew that I was going to be taken to the hospital and have my baby there, even though what I really wanted was to have my baby at home. I was not really in pain and I noticed that my belly was pretty small...then I thought that I better take a picture of my belly, because once my baby was out it would be too late! I don't remember actually giving birth, I think that I just woke up...it was really weird.

Burned out

2006-02-02T08:19:00.000-05:00

It seems like the only reason I write is to complain, but again it's my website so I can do whatever I like!!!

I am really excited to finally see the end of the tunnel, and I can hardly imagine that if everything goes smoothly I should be graduating in August. It seems like I have been taking classes for 4 years without really thinking about the end...my graduation. Maybe that is what made it more bearable, but I have to admit that I am really excited. But it doesn't come without a price.

I sometimes come home after a day of working and going to school looking as if "my dog had just been ran over!" I have a hard time managing my time, that's what it comes down to. Last semester I had classes on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights and this semester I go on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights...what's the difference you ask me? The difference is that last semester I could come home on Monday afternoon and catch up on homework that I hadn't quite finished during the week end...this semester there is none of that. By Sunday night I have to be all done...which is not how it works. So instead I just walk around freaking out most of the time!

The other thing is that I am not that excited about the degree that I am going to graduate with. I am not an MIS person! I can't picture myself doing whatever it is that people with MIS degree do for the rest of my life. I can't even picture myself doing is for a little while! I seem to be able to get good grades and get into it, but not picture myself practicing it. Like a thing that you learn about and then forget about it as soon as you get out of class...except that it is my college degree that we are talking about. I know that people end up not necessarily working in the field that they studied in school but still...

I read all these doula and midwife blogs and I can't help but wish that I had time to do that. I wish that I could read all the material and become a certified doula. I wish that I could go to the farm to one of their workshops. I wish that I had time to read all the books that I have bought and just put up on the bookshelf.

I guess I shouldn't complain, since I have a Husby who loves me, I am healthy and so are all of my close relatives and I am almost graduated...time will come when I'll be able to do what I really want to do.

Sesame Street Personality Test

2006-01-26T10:24:00.000-05:00

Here is a test that my SIL's CFO at NBC Universal made her take! Have fun

The Your SESAME STREET Persona Test

Here are my results!

Snuffleupagus
You scored 62% Organization, 58% abstract, and 59% extroverted!

You are somewhat organized, both concrete and abstract, and both introverted and extroverted.

I bet you didn't think you were Snuffleupagus. Let's find out why.

You are both somewhat organized. You have a good idea where you put things and you probably keep your place reasonably clean. You aren't totally obsessed with neatness though. Alloyius Snuffleupagus (and all Snuffleupagus') is not sloppy by nature, but he moves so incredibly slowly that it is impossible for him to be totally organized.

You both are about equally concrete and abstract thinkers. You have a good balance in your life. You know when to be logical at times, but you also aren't afraid to explore your dreams and desires... within limits of course. Snuffy generally has very basic interests, but he explores his abstract sensitive side when he plays his snuffleflute.

You both are somewhat introverted. Originally Snuffleupagus was very shy and was only Big Bird's invisible friend. However as he has aged he has started to build new friendships with new characters. Like Snuffy, you probably like to have some time to yourself. However, you do appreciate spending time with your friends, and you aren't scared of social situations.

I swear I don't look like that in real life!!

Vacation in Montreal

2006-01-16T21:15:00.000-05:00

Here are some pictures of my vacation in Montreal:

Palace of Justice

Palace of Justice

My mom's dog Tina

The following pictures were taken during a hike next to my mom's house.

Busy busy busy

2006-01-16T08:16:00.000-05:00

It turns out that I seem to be busier now that I am taking 3 classes than when I was taking 4. I think that it comes from the fact that I have gone up the ladder at work, and I now have somebody under me.

Our new employee is 19 and she is a really sweet girl, but it takes more time to explain things to somebody else, and to try to steer her in the right direction when she is working on something than to do it myself. So my days are going by really quickly, so quickly in fact that I haven't read the blogs that I used to read everyday in quite a few days which says a lot about my old position!! I enjoy doing my job better now that I am more involved, and I don't really mind being that busy. Being in class Monday through Friday after work doesn't give me much extra time though.

I did get up at 6.15 this morning and walked for 30 mins on my treadmill, which I am really happy about. I hope that I'll be able to do it almost every morning...we just got cable for out TV a week ago, and I love watching Discovery Health Channel. They have just started the National Body Challenge. "It's a FREE, eight-week, comprehensive online fitness and weight-loss challenge." They also have shows on the Discovery Health Channel that give a lot of information about weight loss. I find it really helpful to read magazines like Fitness and to watch shows like that, because they encourage me. When I watch these shows I feel bad about not doing it myself.

I am really excited because I found the blog of suzannemichelle81. She has just left last Friday for Casa de Nacimiento. It is a birthing center in El Paso, TX where one can learn hands on everything there is to know about pregnancy and birth. A lot of women go there to give birth so it is a really good way to see a lot of births and to learn and develop the skills necessary to follow a woman during pregnancy until the birth of her child as well as during the postpartum period. I would just LOVE to do something like that. Last time I mentioned that to Husby he seemed a little concerned about the fact that Casa happens to be in a poor area...maybe I should discuss it more with him, and may one day we'll have enough money that I can afford to go....

Mosaic

2006-01-06T08:15:00.000-05:00

For Christmas I wanted to make a mosaic for my sister. I have never made a mosaic before, so I had to find out everything about it before I could start: where to find the material, how to put the piece together and how to make it look good.

I went to the library to get some books. Then I went to Home Depot thinking that I could buy some regular tiles, break them and then glue them. It was not a bad idea in itself, except that you have to buy a whole case of tiles there if you want a different color than your regular white or off white.....that was a little too many tiles for me.

I went online and found a store that is really close to where I live, so I decided to go there. The lady was really nice and helpful and got me started in buying the right material for the amount of money I could spend. I also bought a big mirror that I could use for the mosaic.

When I arrived home I started laying the square piece around as if to make geometrical looking mosaic....but then creativity came flooding and I started cutting the pieces to make it look more like a scenery. Since I had bought a lot of blues I thought about making the sea on the bottom and the sky on top, and try to make do it so it would be obvious. Well, enough said about the mosaic here is a picture of it:

My sister really liked it, and I am happy with it. I don't think that this one was really cost effective, but I bought a couple of little mirrors at Ikea, Montreal that cost $3 each, that are not as big, but are definitely a lot cheaper than this one.

Happy New Year 2006!

2006-01-05T18:56:00.000-05:00

Hello Internet!

Happy New Year! Everything went great for me in Montreal. It was really fun to be with my family and I have to admit that I really like the city of Montreal. We were 13 members of my family, which is quite a bit. For many year my grand parents and one aunt and uncle spent the Holidays by themselves as we all lived in France. Now my mom, her boyfriend and sister have moved there. My brother and a cousin who still live in France visited and since Husby and I live only nine driving hours from there we made the trip. Unfortunately Husby didn't stay for the whole week....I think that there were more crazy French people that he can handle!

The trip was not really relaxing since there were quite a few people to see and not much time to do so. I could have handled it perfectly if I didn't find out on Tuesday that classes were starting....Wednesday. I was hoping to spend this week relaxing and cleaning up after the vacation since I came back by train and arrived on Sunday night at 8pm and had to work on Monday, but instead I spent yesterday evening in class until 9h30, and I had to do my now routine run to class as a lunch break for work!

Back to the good old crazy schedule!

Updates

2005-12-21T09:41:00.000-05:00

I started this post on Wednesday and never found time to finish and send it...

Last Monday was our "dating anniversary" with Husby. It has been five years since we have been together. Now that we are married you might wonder why I even mention it...the reason is that have never been with somebody for five whole years before (the longest was a little short of 5 years). It might sound a little silly, because I knew that I would be with him for ever since I married him...so what is 5 years of dating?, but I just wanted to celebrate the date and I gave my husby some Lilies. He took the Pics! :-). I also see what a difference it makes to be with the right person. Even though I was with my ex for almost 5 years, there were break ups and trusting issues...none of that with the man of my life!

One good news, is that the lump that my boss had on his neck, was only a inflamed salivary gland that became the size of a golf ball. He told us that touching and pocking the lump made it basically break, and all the saliva inside of it dissipated. So he is just fine.

Husby and I are trying to buy all the presents to take with us to Montreal where we are going to spend Christmas with my side of the family. It is a marathon. We couldn't go shopping until this week because of the finals being last week, and last week end was...well I needed to relax a little, so now I have to find presents for everybody. (Update: all the presents have been found and bought!)

I received my grades from this semester and I am really happy. I received some really good grades (3.9, 3.7, 3.7, 3.6) even though it was the first time that I took 4 classes at the University and working full time. I have taken 4 classes before while working, but they were at the local Community College so it was a lot less challenging.

We are leaving tonight for Montreal, so I probably won't post anything until after the New Year, so I wish everybody a Merry Chrismas and a Happy New Year!!!

Flickr

2005-12-17T23:31:00.000-05:00

I love taking, and looking at pictures. In fact, we have been having a discussion with Husby who bought a new digital camera. I say it's his Christmas present, since he bought it for himself, by himself, but since I use it more than him he says it's ours and that I owe him a present....

Anyway, since I love pictures so much I created a Flickr account. I am really excited about that and I hope to post lots of pics from my brand new camera :-)! You might even be able to see what I look like....if I decide to post pics of me.

Enjoy my pictures!

More snow flakes

2005-12-15T09:09:00.000-05:00

I can't seem to focus this morning so I figured I could make more snow flakes! I like this one better than the last.

And this time I will actually give the link so that you too can have some fun!

Finaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaals!

2005-12-15T08:58:00.000-05:00

I have to finish my last final exam today, which happens to be a take home due by midnight, and then I am dooooone!!! I can't wait!

Yesterday I told Husby "I am definitely getting drunk on Friday", when he replied: "Aren't you babysitting for your boss Friday night?" well who said it was incompatible?! Just kiddin!

Lots of updates really soon.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

2005-12-10T17:45:00.000-05:00

Here is my snow flake!

Thanks to Hydrangeas are Pretty for the link!

Presentations

2005-12-06T08:56:00.000-05:00

I stayed up until 2.30am this morning to finish up 2 of the projects that I had to work on this semester...I have to present both of them today. It is going to be a FUN day!

My Sweet Doggie

2005-12-04T23:15:00.000-05:00

I can't help but post a new pic of my Louna before going to bed! Such a sweetheart!

The Nutcracker

2005-12-04T01:15:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's been more than 2 weeks that I haven't posted...I have been going crazy, getting sick, going to a seminar, preparing final presentations for my 4 classes....fun fun fun.

The really fun part though was tonight. Last Monday one of the ladies who hires me to babysit her 13 and 9 year old kids called me to see if I could "save" her by taking her daughter and a friend to see the Nutcracker tonight at the Detroit Opera House! That would have been great enough by itself, but on top of that we were part of the gala and had fancy diner before the show, and desert on stage with the dancers after the show, and I made $75! It doesn't get much better than that!

Actually it would have been better if Husby could have come because first of all it would have been nice to share something like that together, and he would have kept me company. You see the girls spent the entire evening (except during the show) hanging out with their friends while I sat on a table by myself trying to look like I am having a blast among these rich people who barely pay attention to me...but I enjoyed it...the show part anyway...it was realy gorgeous.

I have another 2 weeks of craziness with school and then I get a winter break, which I can't wait for anymore. Hopefully I'll be able to post a little more.

Beauty

2005-11-17T16:42:00.000-05:00

At this rate, I'd look flawless too!

Courtesy of simplicity.

What a Great Car!

2005-11-15T16:30:00.000-05:00

What I love about my car is that I never know if it'll start. I don't even have an old car, it's a Ford Focus 2000, but it comes with the option that if it doesn't feel like it....it just won't do it...and today it didn't feel like it anymore. I went to the gas station after taking a final exam from 1 to 2pm without having lunch (you can imagine that I already was in a GREAT mood) and when I tried to start the car....nothing! The guys at the station were really nice, and they were able to start it, but damn it I'm tired of it...

One time Husby thought I was stupid when I called him and told him that I couldn't insert the key into the ignition...no no no, the ignition had broken...It has another fun option, when I open the front passenger window, instead of going straight down it goes down and sideways (kinda hard to picture...that's how cool my car is) and when I close it it goes back up by rotating back to the straight original position.

I won't extrapolate about the fact that one of the back doors doesn't open anymore...I guess I need a new car!

Lost Friendship

2005-11-11T14:29:00.000-05:00

I have been having a hard time making friends since I have arrived in the States 5 years ago. I don't seem to be able to meet people, and if I do, we don't get along enough to actually become "friends".

The only person who I considered my friend was F. She is French like me, and when we met it was like meeting somebody really special. You know that person with whom you can talk for hours and hours and never have that awkward moment where you look for something to talk about. We didn't see each other often, but when we did we had fun.

F has had a hard life, and I slowly realized that i was mostly listening to her talking about her problems rather than having 2-way discussions. Everything went down when I got married. She couldn't make it to my bachelorette party because it ended up being too late (it was a Thursday night), but worst of all I didn't hear from her until one month after the wedding when she invited me for her birthday (We had a really small wedding with only Husby's family.) Needless to say that I was disappointed and upset.

When she sent me an e-mail for Thanksgiving last year, I replied, and we started talking again. I was ready to forgive her and move on. Last February was the last time we talked, I spent 45 minutes listening to her problems without being able to say anything...that's when I drew the line. I decided not to call her again.

I thought about her quite often. She had told me that she thought that she was going to get engaged soon, so I wondered how she was doing....I missed her. She never called...until last night. She is leaving to Australia. She wants to see me before she leaves...she sounded upset.

We are seeing each other tomorrow. I am upset that our friendship failed. I wonder what has happened in her life, I am looking forward to see her tomorrow probably for the last time....

All that just to say that it sucks not having anybody that you can call a friend. Somebody that you can call when you are upset, when you want to complain or just talk about the funniest thing that happened to you today. Somebody to have a girl talk with.

Boring Template?

2005-11-09T10:43:00.000-05:00

Did I really hear you say that? First of all it's not nice for all the other bloggers who have adopted this template and are totally happy with it, and second I don't think that it's that bad...and I don't have time to edit it so it'll have to do for now.

New Job Title?

2005-11-08T16:50:00.000-05:00

Remember my brainless job ? Yeah, well I went from not doing much, to handling anything that has to do with money in the company, because we parted ways with our controller and I am taking over his position (with the help of other co-workers to get me started).

I don't know if I should cry or dance! I am happy because it evidently means that I will be doing more interesting things and learning a lot, but I wonder how I am supposed to keep doing what I was doing before, add another person's full time job to that, and don't forget to juggle 4 classes with all that!

I think that I am stressing myself too much, and that I will learn quickly and be able to handle it, but I don't think that I will be taking the 4 classes that I initially wanted to take next semester.

It is a big step for me, although not necessarily in the direction that I expected..., but I believe that learning new things is good, and it can only be valuable.

Sometimes when you wonder what decisions to make the answer comes to you instead of you having to actively search for it....I'll let you know how everything goes.

Blog Template

2005-11-02T09:34:00.000-05:00

I am really frustrated because:

1. I REALLY liked the way my blog looked and now the link to the original template is broken, so I have to look for another one
2. I can't find a look that I like
3. I could pick a simple one and edit it, but I don't have the time....

hopefully I'll find the time to make my blog look crispy again soon...

Disappointment

2005-10-31T10:31:00.000-05:00

There is a Music, Theatre and Dance department at my University and they give representations. I really enjoy arts and so I try to go and see as many shows as I can...it hasn't been too many so far, but it seems like every year, when the professional Modern dancers come to give a representation I babysit...which upsets me. So this time, I asked the mom of the kids (13 and 11 year old) if she thought that they would be interested in going to see the show with me. Even though I doubted that it would work, I thought that it was worth trying.

At about 3pm on Saturday afternoon the mom called me and asked me if I could still get tickets...I was really happy and ready to enjoy the show with the kids and being paid for it!

When I got to their house the parents told me that we would not go after all because one of the kids was working on a project and she would not be back on time....They probably noticed the disappointment on my face and asked me if it "messed up my plans!" which I thought was ironic since my original job was to babysit after all.

So once again I wasn't able to see the show...maybe I’ll get to see it next year...

Future

2005-10-26T19:45:00.000-04:00

I had a discussion on Sunday with Husby that started when he asked me: "What do you think that you'll do once you graduate?" Excellent question!

I currently work in a little office of about 10 employees. I started working there 2 years ago. It is a great place for me right now because I don't need to use my brain too much, and since I go to school full time, I prefer to save my brain power for that. I really like all the people that I work with, which is great.

I am working on a business degree right now, and Husby is worried that I won't have much experience once I graduate, which is not good for my resume. My problem is that I am in the Business School, not because I love it, and I dream of working in an office for the rest of my life, and I just can't wait to start my own business, but because I didn't know that I wanted to into the health care field until I had already started. Don't get me wrong I don't hate it, I in fact enjoy learning all these things, but I just can't picture myself working in an office and be happy.

The first answer that came out was: "I'll just ask for a huge raise, and keep working there." I just picture myself not doing much and making lots of money, and doulaing on the side...not a bad thing is it? Then Husby mentionned Midwifery, and asked me when I thought that I would become a midwife. The thing is I don't think that it is feasible to be a midwife with young children at home. I don't mind waiting for a while before becoming a midwife; there are a lot of things that I could do in the mean time to keep me connected to the birth community, such as becoming a doula, a lactation consultant, a child birth educator...

What about being a nurse then? I could do a nursing degree soon after I graduate, which would allow me to learn a lot, and it will take me a step closer to becoming a midwife. But I have 2 issues:
- Could I handle being a nurse?
- Do I want to be a Registered Nurse Midwife or a Direct Entry Midwife?

Could I handle being a nurse? Two things worry me. First of all I am worried that as a nursing student I will end up in an ER, or some place where I'll see some terribly sad things...and I would just freak out. Ideally I would be a Labor and Delivery nurse, but I know that I would have to be exposed to all sorts of things before being able to choose my field. Then, when I do get to be a L&D nurse, I will still have to see uneccessary interventions being done to laboring women. This part is not as bad, as it would allow me to be the "good" one around the woman, the one who listens, answers questions, and tries to comfort her, but it would probably be REALLY frustrating.

Do I want to be a Direct Entry Midwife then, and only deal with heatlhy women who have healthy pregnancies and healthy babies? Being a Direct Entry Midwife would mean that I would not be able to practice in some states, it would probably mean that I would not have the exposure that comes with being a nurse.

There are good pros and cons to any decision to be made. I do have to think hard about that. One thing I know is that I am REALLY attracted by birth and everything around it. I know that I will be involved in it, somehow. I also know that my business degree is a great thing to fall back on, and to make money while I figure out exactly what path I will take.

Lots to think about...

End of Internet

2005-10-26T19:14:00.000-04:00

I have found the end of the Internet!!

Overheard Discussion

2005-10-25T10:12:00.000-04:00

I was at Wallmart yesterday after work, and I was walking through the aisles, I heard a lady saying: "21 hours...it took me 21 hours and after 18 hours I couldn't take it anymore." I knew right then and there what she was talking about. She kept going: "I asked for the epidural, but I got it too late and it didn't do anything." The lady who was talking was a Wallmart employee chatting with fellow employees. As I was walking away I heard her ask her co-worker: "Do you think that you would ask for the epidural?" At this moment I turned around to look at them, and it didn't seem like the lady who was asked this question was pregnant, I just heard a faint: "I don't know..."

Why do women feel the need to scare pregnant women about giving birth? I am aware of the fact that reality is only as real as our experiences, but why the need to add fear about what a first time mom is about to experience. I guess it's only natural to want to talk about our experiences. I do think though, that only good vibes should be allowed around pregnant women. Let them experience it. Talk about your traumatizing birthing experience with a non-pregnant woman...there are a lot of us!

Bamboo

2005-10-25T09:05:00.000-04:00

Do you see the bamboo? and the little yellow flower next to the title of this post? I didn't think so...I think that my template is broken :-(

Five Years

2005-10-23T14:48:00.000-04:00

Today it has been 5 years since the first day I landed in this country! I had just arrived in New Jersey somewhere....in a hotel with about 200 other au pairs from all over the world. I had just left my family and my boyfriend of 5 years. I was really excited about what was going to happen next! We stayed at the hotel for 3 days where we had meetings after meetings to teach us as much as possible about the US and what was going to happen to us during the year ahead.

I met Husby less than 2 months after I arrived...the rest is history!! Coming here was a really good thing for me. On top of the fact that I met Husby, I started going to college. I was rather lost when I was in France. After graduating from high School I had no idea what studies I wanted to pursue (heck i'm still not sure!) Except that you can't just go with the flow in France and take General Education classes until something clicks and you make a decision. You have to know what you want to study when you get out of High School and start the program the next September. If you happen to realize that you don't like the program, you have just lost one whole year of studies, as the next "semester" will start the following September!

So I started working. I worked at McDonald's for a while, then I was a cashier in a huge grocery store...I was trying to figure what the heck I could do with my life and the idea of having a day care at home crossed my mind...as you can see I didn't have much enthusiasm. One day my boyfriend of the time asked me: "I know that you are not happy...what would make you happy? What would you like to do?" We knew a girl who had been au pair for a year in the US and she just loved it, so my answer was simple "I want to go to the US and be an au pair" He didn't expect that, but nonetheless let me fill up all the forms and get ready to leave.

I have to admit that I did not miss my family or my country at first. It was like a vacation and I was enjoying myself. The family that I worked for sucked, but other than that I was partying away and spending a LOT of time with Husby! When the end of the year came closer, I was ready to move on. I was done being an au pair, I felt like I was wasting my time. I started to go to a Community College as soon as I was done to start taking classes even though I was still not quite sure what I was heading toward.

I really have to acknowledge my in-laws without whom this would more than likely not have been possible. They agreed to sponsor me when I applied for an international student visa.

Husby has been really supportive and he instilled some values in me that I didn't have before meeting him. He pushes me to try harder and I now believe that I could probably achieve a lot of things that I set my mind to. I will be receiving my Bachelor degree in Management Information System a little after 5 years being in this country, which I can say that I am proud of, knowing that English is not my native language (It will have taken me exactly 4 years to graduate while working at least 35 hours a week the whole time....I'm proud of that!)

I am not by any mean saying that it was always easy. First of all being far from my family was fun for a while, but even though I made the decision to live abroad, I started missing them pretty quickly, and I wish I could live closer to them. The other thing that is hard is being a foreigner. I am happy about the fact that I never had any problems with anybody because of where I come from (except that my country was criticized by a professor and an entire class without them knowing that I was from there...but that's another story) even when there was tension between France and the US because of the was in Iraq. What I refer to when I say being a foreigner, is all the paperwork that has to be filled up, and all the extra money that I have to pay to take classes, and the couple of times when I couldn't leave the country because my paperwork was being processed...(while my green card was being processed I was "stuck" here for one year, while my family was just behind the borders in Canada!)

The last five years went by really quickly. I wonder what I would be up to if I hadn't had the courage to leave by myself to a foreign country...One thing is for sure, I am glad I did, I am happy to be where I am right now.

Latest Books

2005-10-23T09:34:00.000-04:00

The two last books I have read are Jamais sans ma fille (in English: Not Without My Daughter) and Et si c'etait vrai (in English: If Only it Were True). I put the titles in both French and English because I read them in French.

"Jamais sans ma fille" by Betty Mahmoody is the true story of an American woman who married an Iranian Doctor. One day she agrees to go to Iran to visit her husband's family, even though she is worried that something bad will happen to her and her daughter. It was supposed to be a 10-day vacation, but her husband kept her and her daughter "prisoners". She could not ask for the help of the American Embassy, because she was regarded as Iranian since she had married an Iranian man. It took her a year and a half to find a way to go back to the US with her daughter.
This story was really interesting because it describes the way Iranian people live. I am aware of the fact that it is described by a woman who is there against her will so the description might be biased. It seems like their way of life is just so totally different from the Western way of life.

The story is also really stressful as it happens during the war between Iran and Irak. A lot of times, the alarms would sound in the city, and planes would start throwing bombs over people's head. It does help realize how lucky we are to be living in a place where we don't have to experience such traumatizing things. A couple of days after reading this book, I actualy dreamed that I was shot at while being in a car covered by a drape so I couldn't see where the shot was coming from....not a good dream!

The second book is definitely lighter. "Et si c'etait vrai" from Marc Levy, tells the story of a woman who has a car accident and ends up in the coma. But that's not it! Even though her body lies inert at the hospital, her soul travels around, and as she hangs out in the apartment where she lived before the accident, the new guy who rents the apartment sees her, and is the first and the only one to be able to see her.

It is a realy sweet and romantic comedy, that has a lot of interesting comments about life. One of my favorite part is when Lauren tells Arthur: "Imagine that you won a lottery, and the price would be what follows. Every morning a bank account would be open with $86,400 for you. But there are 2 rules to follow. The first one is that anything that you haven't spent during the day would disappear at night, you can't cheat, you can't transfer the money to another account, you can only spend it, but every morning when you wake up, there is a new account for you with $86,400 for the day. The second rule is that the bank can stop the game without telling you: at any time they can tell you that it's over, that they close the account, and that there will not be anymore money. What would you do?" After telling her what he would do with the money Lauren explains: "We all have this magic bank, it is time! Every morning when we wake up, we have a credit of 86,400 minutes for the day, and when we go to bed at night, what we didn't live during that day islost, yesterday has passed. Every morning this magic starts again, we have a credit of 86,400 seconds of life, and we play with this unbendable rule: the bank can close our account at any time, without warning us: at any time, life can stop." (I'm sorry it seems to be a recurring theme lately...)

I thought that the analogy was realy interesting, and so true. Trying to enjoy life as much as possible is a good goal to strive for I think.

Busy Week

2005-10-21T08:35:00.000-04:00

I am e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d. I had a really busy week with 2 mid-terms and a few meetings with classmates to work on group projects. I litteraly have group projects with every single class this semester. As I am sure you know, group projects can be hard to handle, depending on your classmates. I am happy to report that it seems like the midterms went well.

Now I am going to pretend that I am awake all day at work, and just patiently wait for 5pm to arrive...wish me luck!

Worries

2005-10-18T11:52:00.000-04:00

WARNING...NOT a happy post.

I just learned on Friday that my boss has a lump on his throat. His uncle got throat cancer at exactly my boss' age, and his father did to...needless to say the chances for the tumor being malignant are high. My boss is 38 and has a 10 year old step daughter, and a 2 year old daughter. He acts as if he's not concerned, he says that if God decided that he should go early, then so be it. I wonder how he really feels. I sure can't imagine how it feels to be in his shoes. He is going to have a biopsy next week. I am really worried.

Death scares me. Let me rephrase that, the idea of people close to me dying scare me. My father's death a year and a half ago has been really hard for me. It was totally unexpected, and I was far from him and wasn't able to go back to France on time for his funeral. I was really close to him. I miss him enormously.

Husby dreamed that he died about a month ago. It was not painful he said..he just realized that he had died. The feeling of emptiness that I felt when my father passed instantly came back to me. I could almost touch it. I became really upset, I had to calm myself down and remind myself that he was healthy and right there next to me. I also can't stand suspens when I am Instant Messaging anymore; yesterday my sister told me that she had something to tell me...that it was probably not the right time because it wasn't happy news...I was just dying..(no pun intended) What she told me was indeed not good since it was related to her grieving about my dad, but I thought "something happened to my mom, my brother, grandma...(fill in the blank)"

Death is as natural as birth, and I know that my dad is happier than he was when he was alive. But the feeling of loss is really hard.

I really hope that my boss is fine, I know that there is no need to worry until the diagnosis comes back since there is nothing that anybody can do at this point. Sorry for sounding so down...I'll put an update on his health status.

Missed Opportunity

2005-10-14T13:35:00.000-04:00

You know how it feels when you didn't do something when you could have done it, and later regret not having done it? (I did learn that asking questions like that arouse the interest of the reader...I just need to practice and get better at it!)

Well today I was having lunch with Husby and a couple of friends and one of the ladies that I used to babysit for walked in the resaturant. I was kind of trying to hide from her and now that I think about it I don't really know why. Maybe I was shy? I haven't seen her in 3 years and seeing her reminded me of the time I spent with her son R. She also has a daughter, E, but I didn't really get along with her.

R was 3 years old when I started babysitting him. He has big brown eyes with dark hair, and some people thought that he was my son, since we have the same features. I had such a good connection with him. Many times he ran out of his house crying when I was backing up from the driveway, screaming "You didn't give me a kiss!!" He was the cutest and sweetest boy. I didn't babysit his sister as much because she was older and spent her days at school, while he only went to school until 11.30.

Their mom let me go because her husband changed his work schedule and could go pick the kids up from school everyday. She told me that I could still work until I found another job, and gave me the name of another lady whose children go to the same school as R and T.

The last time I saw R was at his school, while visiting with the other kids I was now babysitting. R was excited to see me, and he was as sweet as ever. It was prayer time in the Catholic school so I sat down on the floor with R on my lap. The teacher started her prayer saying "Thank you God for having all the moms, dads, sisters, and brothers reunited here with us today" and R to scream "and babysitters!!!"

So today I had the opportunity to ask about him, and I didn't. I feel so stupid and I am disappointed. I hope that if I ever run into his mom again I'll have the bright idea to stop and say hello...

Nice dinner and Lots of Books!

2005-10-11T12:25:00.000-04:00

I feel bad that I haven't updated the Internet about my birthday, I was too busy getting free Textbooks*.

To start the evening I went with my co-workers for Happy hour in a bar/restaurant close to the office. It was a lot of fun. I am very lucky to work with such a crazy crowd...it is a small office and they really feel like friends rather than co-workers (well most of the time anyway).

Later dear Husby took me to the Whitney for my birthday! It is an old mansion that was turned into a nice restaurant in downtown Detroit. It was like having dinner in a museum. I had never been in a restaurant where the waiter takes the napkin from the table and sets it on your lap! Really fancy, with a lot of antic furniture and old paintings and sculptures. We were so full after dinner that we ordered a Creme Brulee to go. We laughed when we opened the package later on and the creme brulee looked like it had been set on a timer to explode, and...well the timer had went off! The creme was all flat and sideways, but Ohhh so good! It had some berries on top and a lot of caramel...

Then on Saturday we went to my in-laws and since I had told them previously that I would like a book they asked me which book I would like. So I opened my Amazon WishList and told them the ones that I would really like to have...my Father-in-Law ended up giving me a check for the amount that would allow me to buy ALL the books that I really want. I thought that that was so very sweet of him.

Needless to say that I am very happy, I had a very nice 25th birthday, thanks everybody for being so nice.

*I received the second highest score for my stats mid-term, and my professor gave me a Statistics Textbook to congratulate me....I AM OFFICIALLY A NERD! ( Although I am probably going to resell it...I am not nerdy enough to read a Statistics textbook for fun!)

Happy Birthday to Me!!

2005-10-07T08:32:00.000-04:00

Yes, you are right, I am so conceded that I wish myself a Happy Birthday! And I would like to thank my mom for the pain that she endured to bring me into this world 25 years ago, and making me into this wonderful woman that I am...(hey it's my birthday somebody has to do the job!)
I am looking forward to see where Husby will be taking me tonight. I trust that it will be great, because he really knows how to make me feel special.

Gotta go, I have a special day to enjoy!

Louna!

2005-10-03T20:50:00.000-04:00

Here she is! This is our Louna.

We have had her for a year now, and she is really the sweetest thing. She loves to cuddle, and give kisses. She is really independent, and she has escaped a few times. The best thing about her is that she can be really active if we take her to the dog park, and run around with other dogs for hours, or when a lazy day occurs, she is happy to just lay and cuddle all day.
She is the best, and we love her very much...how could you not?