Burned out
It seems like the only reason I write is to complain, but again it's my website so I can do whatever I like!!!
I am really excited to finally see the end of the tunnel, and I can hardly imagine that if everything goes smoothly I should be graduating in August. It seems like I have been taking classes for 4 years without really thinking about the end...my graduation. Maybe that is what made it more bearable, but I have to admit that I am really excited. But it doesn't come without a price.
I sometimes come home after a day of working and going to school looking as if "my dog had just been ran over!" I have a hard time managing my time, that's what it comes down to. Last semester I had classes on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights and this semester I go on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights...what's the difference you ask me? The difference is that last semester I could come home on Monday afternoon and catch up on homework that I hadn't quite finished during the week end...this semester there is none of that. By Sunday night I have to be all done...which is not how it works. So instead I just walk around freaking out most of the time!
The other thing is that I am not that excited about the degree that I am going to graduate with. I am not an MIS person! I can't picture myself doing whatever it is that people with MIS degree do for the rest of my life. I can't even picture myself doing is for a little while! I seem to be able to get good grades and get into it, but not picture myself practicing it. Like a thing that you learn about and then forget about it as soon as you get out of class...except that it is my college degree that we are talking about. I know that people end up not necessarily working in the field that they studied in school but still...
I read all these doula and midwife blogs and I can't help but wish that I had time to do that. I wish that I could read all the material and become a certified doula. I wish that I could go to the farm to one of their workshops. I wish that I had time to read all the books that I have bought and just put up on the bookshelf.
I guess I shouldn't complain, since I have a Husby who loves me, I am healthy and so are all of my close relatives and I am almost graduated...time will come when I'll be able to do what I really want to do.
I am really excited to finally see the end of the tunnel, and I can hardly imagine that if everything goes smoothly I should be graduating in August. It seems like I have been taking classes for 4 years without really thinking about the end...my graduation. Maybe that is what made it more bearable, but I have to admit that I am really excited. But it doesn't come without a price.
I sometimes come home after a day of working and going to school looking as if "my dog had just been ran over!" I have a hard time managing my time, that's what it comes down to. Last semester I had classes on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights and this semester I go on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights...what's the difference you ask me? The difference is that last semester I could come home on Monday afternoon and catch up on homework that I hadn't quite finished during the week end...this semester there is none of that. By Sunday night I have to be all done...which is not how it works. So instead I just walk around freaking out most of the time!
The other thing is that I am not that excited about the degree that I am going to graduate with. I am not an MIS person! I can't picture myself doing whatever it is that people with MIS degree do for the rest of my life. I can't even picture myself doing is for a little while! I seem to be able to get good grades and get into it, but not picture myself practicing it. Like a thing that you learn about and then forget about it as soon as you get out of class...except that it is my college degree that we are talking about. I know that people end up not necessarily working in the field that they studied in school but still...
I read all these doula and midwife blogs and I can't help but wish that I had time to do that. I wish that I could read all the material and become a certified doula. I wish that I could go to the farm to one of their workshops. I wish that I had time to read all the books that I have bought and just put up on the bookshelf.
I guess I shouldn't complain, since I have a Husby who loves me, I am healthy and so are all of my close relatives and I am almost graduated...time will come when I'll be able to do what I really want to do.
posted by Bebu at 8:19 AM
3 Comments:
Dare I say you have time to do it "all". Hang in there...you can (and should) read lots now.
Hh
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Thanks for your comment Milliner's Dream. It really feels sometimes like there is not enough time to do it all, but I trust that when the right time arrives everyhting that is supposed to happen will.
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