Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Future

I had a discussion on Sunday with Husby that started when he asked me: "What do you think that you'll do once you graduate?" Excellent question!

I currently work in a little office of about 10 employees. I started working there 2 years ago. It is a great place for me right now because I don't need to use my brain too much, and since I go to school full time, I prefer to save my brain power for that. I really like all the people that I work with, which is great.

I am working on a business degree right now, and Husby is worried that I won't have much experience once I graduate, which is not good for my resume. My problem is that I am in the Business School, not because I love it, and I dream of working in an office for the rest of my life, and I just can't wait to start my own business, but because I didn't know that I wanted to into the health care field until I had already started. Don't get me wrong I don't hate it, I in fact enjoy learning all these things, but I just can't picture myself working in an office and be happy.

The first answer that came out was: "I'll just ask for a huge raise, and keep working there." I just picture myself not doing much and making lots of money, and doulaing on the side...not a bad thing is it? Then Husby mentionned Midwifery, and asked me when I thought that I would become a midwife. The thing is I don't think that it is feasible to be a midwife with young children at home. I don't mind waiting for a while before becoming a midwife; there are a lot of things that I could do in the mean time to keep me connected to the birth community, such as becoming a doula, a lactation consultant, a child birth educator...

What about being a nurse then? I could do a nursing degree soon after I graduate, which would allow me to learn a lot, and it will take me a step closer to becoming a midwife. But I have 2 issues:
- Could I handle being a nurse?
- Do I want to be a Registered Nurse Midwife or a Direct Entry Midwife?

Could I handle being a nurse? Two things worry me. First of all I am worried that as a nursing student I will end up in an ER, or some place where I'll see some terribly sad things...and I would just freak out. Ideally I would be a Labor and Delivery nurse, but I know that I would have to be exposed to all sorts of things before being able to choose my field. Then, when I do get to be a L&D nurse, I will still have to see uneccessary interventions being done to laboring women. This part is not as bad, as it would allow me to be the "good" one around the woman, the one who listens, answers questions, and tries to comfort her, but it would probably be REALLY frustrating.

Do I want to be a Direct Entry Midwife then, and only deal with heatlhy women who have healthy pregnancies and healthy babies? Being a Direct Entry Midwife would mean that I would not be able to practice in some states, it would probably mean that I would not have the exposure that comes with being a nurse.

There are good pros and cons to any decision to be made. I do have to think hard about that. One thing I know is that I am REALLY attracted by birth and everything around it. I know that I will be involved in it, somehow. I also know that my business degree is a great thing to fall back on, and to make money while I figure out exactly what path I will take.

Lots to think about...

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